大腦是如何欺騙了你雙語
令人心碎的情感痛苦讓人苦惱不已。那么你知道嗎?在這個(gè)時(shí)候你的大腦已經(jīng)在工作了!接下來,小編給大家準(zhǔn)備了大腦是如何欺騙了你雙語,歡迎大家參考與借鑒。
大腦是如何欺騙了你雙語
the emotional pain that heartbreak evokes is excruciating. Nothing else matters, no one else matters. We can barely function, think, or move. We feel removed from everyone and alone in a haze of unreality, trapped in our shattered world. All we can see is the person who broke our heart, and all we can feel is terrible pain.
令人心碎的情感痛苦讓人苦惱不已。沒有別的事重要,沒有別人重要。我們幾乎不能正常工作,幾乎不能思考,幾乎不能改變。我們感到被人拋棄了,然后在地獄般朦朧虛幻中孤獨(dú),被困在破碎的世界里。我們都知道傷我們的心的人,我們都會(huì)感到可怕的痛苦。
What we want most is for the pain to ease, to stop hurting so badly — but that is not what our mind wants.
世界上讓我們最想要的東西是為了減輕痛苦,停止如此嚴(yán)重的傷害。但是這不是我們的思想想要的東西。
When our heart is broken, our mind has a very different agenda than we do. As a result, it ends up deceiving us and making things worse. If we want to stop hurting and move on, we need to know when NOT to trust what our mind tells us.
當(dāng)我們心碎時(shí),我們的思想和我們的議程有很大的不同。結(jié)果是,它還是欺騙了我們,讓事情變得更糟糕了。如果我們想知道停止傷害,繼續(xù)前進(jìn),我們需要什么時(shí)候不再去相信我們的思想所告訴我們的東西。
Why We Cannot Trust Our Mind When We Have a Broken Heart
當(dāng)我們心碎的時(shí)候, 為什么我們不能相信自己的思想.
To stop hurting, we need to accept the reality of the breakup and make efforts to move on. We need to reduce the amount of time we spend thinking about the person who broke our heart. We need to diminish their presence in our thoughts and our lives, slowly but surely.
為了停止傷害,我們需要接受破碎的現(xiàn)實(shí),然后努力繼續(xù)前進(jìn)。我們需要減少時(shí)間,花在令我們心碎的人所用的時(shí)間。我們慢慢地但堅(jiān)定地減少他們在我們的思想和生活中的存在。
Our mind wants to do the opposite. Our mind wants us to think about the person all the time, to hold on to the pain and never forget who and what caused it. Our mind wants this, because it is trying to "protect" us in the manner in which it typically does. If something causes us pain, like a hot stove, our mind’s job is to remind us not to touch that hot stove again, to make sure we remember how painful it was the first time. The more painful the experience, the more our mind will labor to make sure we don’t forget it, so we never make that "mistake" again. Given how excruciating heartbreak is, our mind will do everything it can to keep that pain fresh in our thoughts. As a result, our mind will trick us into thinking that ...:
我們的大腦做相反的事。思想想讓我們一直想著那個(gè)人,把持住痛苦,然后永遠(yuǎn)不要忘記誰和什么原因所造成的。它需求這個(gè)時(shí),因?yàn)橐运ǔ5姆绞饺ケM力“保護(hù)我們”。如果某事引起我們的痛苦,如熱風(fēng)爐。我們的大腦提醒我們不要再觸碰那個(gè)熱風(fēng)爐,為了確保我們記得第一次接觸爐子時(shí)有多痛苦。一次經(jīng)歷越痛苦,我們的大腦越努力確保我們不會(huì)忘記它,因此我們不會(huì)再犯那樣的錯(cuò)誤??紤]到心碎是多么痛苦的,我們的大腦會(huì)做一切的事,它會(huì)在我們的腦海我們的痛苦那么新鮮。結(jié)果是我們的大腦會(huì)哄騙我們思考:
1. Our ex was the best, the one, the only one.
1.我們前任是最好的,獨(dú)一無二的。
Our mind will try to remind us of our ex’s best qualities. Images of them at their best will pop into our head unbidden. However, this unbalanced, unrealistic, and idealized portrayal of the person who broke our heart will only make the pain we feel worse.
我們的大腦會(huì)試圖提醒我們前任的優(yōu)點(diǎn)。他們最好的形象會(huì)不請自來地出現(xiàn)在我們的腦海里。然而, 這種不平衡的、不現(xiàn)實(shí)的、理想化的描述傷透了我們的心, 只會(huì)讓我們感覺更糟糕。
2. The relationship made us happy all the time.
2.這段關(guān)系使我們一直快樂。
No, it didn’t; no relationship does. There were plenty of frustrating, annoying, or hurtful moments, and we should recall those as well.
不是,它沒有任何關(guān)系。這也會(huì)有很多的沮喪,憤怒或是傷心的時(shí)刻。我們應(yīng)該也記得這些。
3. If we just text them or contact them, we will feel better.
3.如果我們只是發(fā)短信或者聯(lián)系他們, 我們會(huì)感覺更好。
The urge to text, message, call, or email will be very strong. But doing those things will only make us feel more desperate and needy, and hurt our self-esteem.
發(fā)短信、留言、打電話或發(fā)電子郵件的沖動(dòng)將會(huì)非常強(qiáng)烈。但是做這些事情只會(huì)讓我們感到更加絕望和貧窮, 傷害我們的自尊心。
4. Talking about the breakup with all our friends will ease our pain.
4.和我們所有的朋友談?wù)摲质謺?huì)減輕我們的痛苦。
No, it won’t. Talking about emotionally painful events is natural — even useful, if we do it in a problem-solving way, or if we do it to get emotional validation. But just going over the same details again and again will only make us feel worse.
不, 不會(huì)的。談?wù)撉楦猩贤纯嗟氖虑槭呛茏匀坏? 甚至是有用的, 如果我們用解決問題的方式, 或者我們這樣做是為了獲得情感上的認(rèn)可。但是一次又一次地重復(fù)同樣的細(xì)節(jié)只會(huì)讓我們感覺更糟。
5. We have to know exactly why the breakup occurred.
5.我們必須明確地知道為什么會(huì)發(fā)生分手。
Having a clear understanding of why a breakup occurred is actually useful. However, few of us ever get a clear and honest explanation for such things. Trying to get into our ex’s head to understand why things didn’t work out is a rabbit hole. Better to settle on "they weren’t in love enough" or "we were not the right match."
對(duì)分手的原因有一個(gè)清晰的理解實(shí)際上是有用的。然而, 我們當(dāng)中很少有人能夠?qū)@些事情做出清楚和誠實(shí)的解釋。試圖進(jìn)入我們前任的腦袋里去理解為什么事情沒有解決是一個(gè)兔子洞。還不如說"他們不夠相愛"或者"我們不合適"
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