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美國本科申請個人陳述禁忌有哪些

時間: 淑賢744 分享

美國本科申請個人陳述禁忌有哪些

  美國本科留學(xué)申請個人陳述主要用于描述個人的背景、申請目的、研究方向等方面。個人陳述對于留學(xué)申請成功的作用尤為重要。下面就是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編給大家整理的美國本科申請個人陳述禁忌,希望對你有用!

  美國本科申請個人陳述禁忌

  1. 一葉知秋型

  “從我五歲開始/很小的時候開始,我就閱讀了關(guān)于XXX的XX書籍/就喜歡觀察思考/拆卸玩具/我身為XXX的爸爸就把他高大的身影烙在了我心里…… 所以我從XX歲開始就立志做一個XXX……”

  解讀:這是personal statement或statement of purpose,不是人生傳記;大家都用這樣的開頭,好象都是幼兒立志少年奮發(fā)型,弗洛伊德得太不真實。如果確實有孩童時期特殊的經(jīng)歷諸如六歲就到劍橋?qū)嶒炇覅⒂^過寫也無妨,一般平凡如我的話還是能省則省。

  2. 豪情引語型

  “Nothing is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow. This old saying always lingers in my mind; it reminds me that every dream can be reached through hard work...”

  解讀:一切皆有可能。這段開頭真是很振奮人心,然而,在西方文化中,別人不會立刻理解你想表達(dá)什么,尤其是在你的“personal”文章里。永遠(yuǎn)不要以大而空的議論開頭,去談諸如人類的本性和人生的真諦。 何況,除非真的完美配合,引用名言即使在中文作文里也已經(jīng)是遍地開花了。

  最常見的引用:《阿甘正傳》-人生就像一盒巧克力.......為什么不中國特色一點寫八寶粥....?

  建議:大多數(shù)時候,最好的開頭方式是做到盡可能的自然、個人和流暢。文科你只需講一個簡單的故事,讓讀者自己去想這故事表達(dá)了一些什么,或者直接就以令人信服的方式,擺明你的觀點。理工科申請者再干脆一點,就直接進(jìn)入我做了某某工程咯。

  美國本科申請文書寫作個人陳述禁忌結(jié)尾:

  泛泛吹捧型

  “America is the most advanced place for XXX. Your department is an idea place for research, not only because there are many great researchers but because the rich atmosphere of University of B is very attractive as well……”

  解讀:在結(jié)尾表明一下自己為什么選擇對方學(xué)校和院系是無可厚非的,但是這種能套用到n所大學(xué)的句子還是能免則免。對方當(dāng)然知道自己學(xué)校好,無須你的溢美之辭;最重要的是寫名哪個具體的特點或者老師吸引了你,如何與你的治學(xué)經(jīng)歷和研究方向匹配,它如何幫助你,你又如何為它創(chuàng)造價值。

  美國留學(xué)申請怎么寫好個人陳述

  一、個人陳述寫作的原則

  1、申請材料的整體性:每個部分提供新的內(nèi)容,不應(yīng)該包含其他部分或文書中已經(jīng)提到的內(nèi)容,避免無意義的重復(fù)。因為招生委員會的人希望從不同的角度了解申請者。

  2、Show, don’t tell:避免太寬泛,要用具體的例子,讓人跟著你的故事得出一個結(jié)論。

  3、個人陳述寫什么內(nèi)容取決于學(xué)校想要看什么內(nèi)容。錄取委員會想看到學(xué)生獨(dú)特性,不想看太常見的事情;他們想看到學(xué)生克服困難的勇氣和決心,不想看到學(xué)生的消極應(yīng)對。錄取委員會想看到你非我們學(xué)校不去的決心,而不是備選。所以在寫學(xué)生的個人陳述時,根據(jù)申請學(xué)校要求來修改個人陳述內(nèi)容。

  4、每一個詞都是有意義的,沒有意義的不要贅述。寫個人陳述中每一部分,自己心里有個大概的字?jǐn)?shù)。字?jǐn)?shù)比較靈活,但是頁數(shù)很明顯,所以學(xué)校要求多少頁,我們最好有多少頁。

  二、個人陳述topic選擇

  1、如何選擇topic:自己很難了解自己是一個什么樣的人時,可以跟身邊的人溝通交流,來了解自己。進(jìn)行Braining storming, 詢問自己一些問題,然后挑出其中自己感覺最好的話題,挑出2個最相關(guān)的內(nèi)容。

  2、應(yīng)避免的topic:寫big game, 比如有一個很重要的足球比賽,主要隊員受傷了,學(xué)生要上場,之前從來沒有參與過,自己很緊張和害怕,開始想起祖父的話,堅持下來,最后贏得了比賽。和申請專業(yè)不相干的新內(nèi)容,內(nèi)容雖新但是和申請不相關(guān),每一意義。最好是我一直想去做什么,比如5歲的夢想,自己都不知道自己想干什么?;蛲蝗辉趺礃樱屓烁杏X你的想法轉(zhuǎn)變太快。

  3、好的topic:道德和人倫、文化、領(lǐng)導(dǎo)能力、失敗和成長

  三、個人陳述中每一部分怎么寫

  1、個人陳述的開頭怎么寫才能吸引招生官:具體特殊的點來切入,直接寫一個場景再解釋。第一段很重要,從故事中間寫,一下子給讀者帶人那個場景,而不是從頭開始寫,很平淡枯燥。

  2、自我介紹:個人經(jīng)歷和興趣來源的聯(lián)系,興趣來源,動機(jī)。像講故事一樣有性格有特點。使用具體的例子展示感情。興趣來源要真實,錄取委員會才會相信;并且興趣來源在剩下內(nèi)容中也有體現(xiàn);對專業(yè)的熱情比興趣來源更加重要。

  3、相關(guān)經(jīng)歷介紹:從學(xué)術(shù)到專業(yè)技能。描寫新的內(nèi)容,可以寫個人趣事和項目結(jié)果。不要寫成績,課程名,職位,職責(zé),因為這些在CV和成績單上已經(jīng)有體現(xiàn)了。

  4、職業(yè)目標(biāo)或長短期目標(biāo):具體但是靈活(可以列舉類型)。短期目標(biāo)可以從跟教授做什么課題,或者提高自己那個方面的能力;長期目標(biāo)要切合實際,不要讓人感覺好高騖遠(yuǎn)

  5、選校原因:要匹配。你是專一的,和學(xué)校項目很匹配,并且如果錄取你之后你會去這個學(xué)校。最好寫學(xué)校傾向于錄取的學(xué)生, 具體研究中心,學(xué)校文化,具體教授(至少兩個,他們的名字,他們的研究方向,你對他們那些研究感興趣),集中的科研或項目機(jī)會。最好不要寫地理位置,學(xué)校很有名,能獲得多少獎學(xué)金,因為這些這個學(xué)校能給你提供,其他學(xué)校也能給你提供,錄取你之后你不一定非去這個學(xué)校。

  6、避免:宗教,政治,cadre,中國成語等??梢允褂妹绹V語。

  四、單詞

  別用你已經(jīng)在書刊里見慣的比喻;簡單詞可以表述清楚的意思,不要使用復(fù)雜詞;盡量使用主動;避免比較弱的單詞;避免太多”I”;簡單句或復(fù)雜句過多給讀者感覺都不好。

  美國留學(xué)申請個人陳述范文

  Personal Statement

  China is a country that pays so much attention and emphasis on education. Elementary School for a starter, following the Junior Middle School, Senior Middle School, College, Graduate School and etc., every student must receive a series of strict and systematic academic training before he really can be put to good use in society. Children’s education plays a very important role in family life too. Parents put so much expectation on their children, and give all they can to shape their children prodigies. Expectation is a two-edged sword: on the one hand, it brings students a strong backup and good surrounding for study that their parents never had; but on the other hand, expectation also means much pressure and rigor. Meanwhile, the pressure does not only come from the family. The competition within schools is so intense that every entering a higher school is like a war – fighting for the opportunities to enter best schools. In the last eleven years, I have been growing under such a background.

  When I was at the age about to enter elementary school, like all the parents under the sun, my mom and dad believed that I deserved the very best from the beginning. So they worked so hard on getting me into the best elementary school of the city. But unfortunately, due to the entering-the-nearest-school rule for primary school prospective students, I finally got into the one that was two blocks away from our house – a mediocre elementary school. To mom and dad, it was all along a big pity that I couldn’t have the best education. But deep in my mind I decided to make up their regret with my own working. So, early since I firstly entered school, I have taken education more seriously than most of my peers. I studied so hard, looking forward to increasing my knowledge, expanding my view of the world and getting more and more mature. Six years quickly disappeared into history. I soon found myself standing in front of another turning point. I made my determination to open myself the best middle school’s gate.

  However, sometimes determination doesn’t always turn out the best result. My knocking didn’t get the most desired answer I was expecting. Again, I missed the chance to enter the best school in our city. However, instead of getting disappointed this time, mom and dad even felt delighted because though it was not the best, the Junior Middle School that admitted me was also a considerably renowned one. Yet I still haven’t got very satisfied about the result. During the three years in Junior Middle School, I never slowed down my steps to pursue my aim.

  My determination pushed me to seek the best in everything I do, whether in academic studies or other aspects of life. I remember the time I got myself into a dilemma. Because of my outstanding trumpet skill, I took the position of chief trumpet player in school orchestra. So I had to keep a well-balanced connection between study and music. But at the end of one semester when I was tensely preparing for the finals, I suddenly received the notification from the orchestra for a big performance, which means I had to spend much time on rehearsal and practicing for my own solo. The two things seemed so conflictive that both mom and dad advised me to give up the performance. But I wanted the performance to be good as much as my academic record. I accepted to make the performance without hesitation. For a whole month, I almost wanted to divide every minute into two. I clutched every second in the daytime to work on my school courses because the trumpet score was waiting for me in the night. In order not to annoy neighbors, I closed myself into the small toilet of our house. It was in summer, the small closed space was so hot and fuggy. My body got totally wet with sweats every time I finished the practicing. After one month, I did very well in both the examination and performance, with the cost of a couple of kilograms’ weight drop. With a determination like that, after the completion of Junior Middle School, I finally got admitted by one of the top middle schools of our city.

  I aspire to study Biochemistry in my undergraduate years and become a scientist specialized in biochemical sciences. Honestly, my first encounter with this subject was not a very pleasant memory. When I was very young, I watched a movie “The 731 Army” which tells of the biochemical weapon research of Japanese Army in China during World War Two. In the movie, Japanese Army uses innocent villagers to test the biochemical weapon, the horrible vision deeply carved in my memory. Since then on, both that movie and biochemistry were an unspeakable taboo to me. But things got totally changed when I began to take chemistry study in middle school. I was suddenly captured by the great fascination of chemistry. Chemical experiment became my most favorite class. And only school studies could not satisfy my curiosity, I expanded my readings to many other sources. From the learning, my early fear of biochemistry was gone completely, because the more I read, the more I found it such a beautiful and useful subject for our human being. I know becoming a scientist in biochemical field will be a long and tiring process. But my determination gives me the confidence and courage to face any challenge and difficulty.


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