查斯特菲爾德勛爵給兒子的信（節(jié)選）
查斯特菲爾德勛爵給獨生子菲利蒲的信成為有史以來最受推崇的家書，被譽為“一部使人脫胎換骨的道德和禮儀全書”。牛津大學(xué)出版社更將其列入該社《世界經(jīng)典》之一。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編跟大家分享的查斯特菲爾德給兒子的信，歡迎大家來閱讀學(xué)習(xí)。
節(jié)選第13封信
As two mails are now due from Holland, I have no letters of yours, or Mr. Harte's to acknowledge; so that this letter is the effect of that 'scribendi cacoethes,' which my fears, my hopes, and my doubts, concerning you give me. When I have wrote you a very long letter upon any subject, it is no sooner gone, but I think I have omitted something in it, which might be of use to you; and then I prepare the supplement for the next post: or else some new subject occurs to me, upon which I fancy I can give you some informations, or point out some rules which may be advantageous to you. This sets me to writing again, though God knows whether to any purpose or not; a few years more can only ascertain that. But, whatever my success may be, my anxiety and my care can only be the effects of that tender affection which I have for you; and which you cannot represent to yourself greater than it really is. But do not mistake the nature of that affection, and think it of a kind that you may with impunity abuse. It is not natural affection, there being in reality no such thing; for, if there were, some inward sentiment must necessarily and reciprocally discover the parent to the child, and the child to the parent, without any exterior indications, knowledge, or acquaintance whatsoever; which never happened since the creation of the world, whatever poets, romance, and novel writers, and such sentiment-mongers, may be pleased to say to the contrary. Neither is my affection for you that of a mother, of which the only, or at least the chief objects, are health and life: I wish you them both most heartily; but, at the same time, I confess they are by no means my principal care.
My object is to have you fit to live; which, if you are not, I do not desire that you should live at all. My affection for you then is, and only will be, proportioned to your merit; which is the only affection that one rational being ought to have for another. Hitherto I have discovered nothing wrong in your heart, or your head: on the contrary I think I see sense in the one, and sentiments in the other. This persuasion is the only motive of my present affection; which will either increase or diminish, according to your merit or demerit. If you have the knowledge, the honor, and probity, which you may have, the marks and warmth of my affection shall amply reward them; but if you have them not, my aversion and indignation will rise in the same proportion; and, in that case, remember, that I am under no further obligation, than to give you the necessary means of subsisting. If ever we quarrel, do not expect or depend upon any weakness in my nature, for a reconciliation, as children frequently do, and often meet with, from silly parents; I have no such weakness about me: and, as I will never quarrel with you but upon some essential point; if once we quarrel, I will never forgive. But I hope and believe, that this declaration (for it is no threat) will prove unnecessary. You are no stranger to the principles of virtue; and, surely, whoever knows virtue must love it. As for knowledge, you have already enough of it, to engage you to acquire more. The ignorant only, either despise it, or think that they have enough: those who have the most are always the most desirous to have more, and know that the most they can have is, alas! but too little. Reconsider, from time to time, and retain the friendly advice which I send you. The advantage will be all your own.
寄自荷蘭的兩封信現(xiàn)在你們應(yīng)該收到了，但我現(xiàn)在還沒收到你或者哈特先生的確認(rèn)信件。所以這封信是一個“寫作狂”的舉動，出于一位父親對你的擔(dān)心、恐懼和疑慮，我提筆給你寫此信。每次，當(dāng)我就某一主題給你寫完一封長信，用不了多久我就會發(fā)現(xiàn)我漏掉了一些可能對你有用的東西，然后我就準(zhǔn)備在下一封信里進行補充。要么就是，我又想起了某個新的話題，我自信還能給你提供一些信息，或者也許只有上天才知道這些信究竟對你有沒有幫助，也許要等很多年以
后我們才能認(rèn)識到其作用。但是，無論我寫的信是否管用，唯一讓我變得如此焦慮和關(guān)心你的原因，只可能是一位父親對你的那份慈愛，這一點你可能難以完全體會。千萬不要誤會這份愛的性質(zhì)，認(rèn)為它們可以被隨意濫用。這不是一種無私的情感，在現(xiàn)實生活中就沒有這樣一種無私的情感;如果人們確實發(fā)現(xiàn)父母對孩子或者孩子對父母存在著這樣一種情感，這種情感也是互動的，無須任何外在的暗示、知識、體驗之類的東西。自從有了這個世界以來就從來沒有發(fā)生過這樣無私的愛，無論詩人、傳奇作家、小說家以及類似的情感制造者在把這種愛向別人傾拆時體會到了怎樣的愉快。我的這份愛不是一個母親對孩子的愛，一個母親唯一關(guān)注，或者說最關(guān)注的是孩子的健康和生命：我希望你和別人都是真心誠意的，但我同時也坦白，這不是我最關(guān)注的東西。
我的目標(biāo)是讓你適應(yīng)生活，如果你不適應(yīng)的話，我甚至根本不希望你活在這個世界上。這樣一來，我對你的愛就是，也只可能是調(diào)和你的優(yōu)點，這是一個理性生物對另一個理性生物唯一擁有的愛。迄今為止，我沒有發(fā)現(xiàn)你的心靈和頭腦中存在什么大的錯誤，相反，我認(rèn)為從你的心靈中，我看到了理智，從你的頭腦中我看到了情感。這也正是現(xiàn)今我對你的愛的唯一來源所在。這種愛意將會隨著你的美德和缺點的變化而增強或減弱。如果你擁有了那些你應(yīng)該具備的知識、榮譽和正直品格，我的愛將會留下足夠的痕跡和溫暖作為回報。但如果你沒做到，那我的反感和憤恨也會以相同比例增長。如果發(fā)生了后一種情況，請記住，除了給你必要的扶持手段外，我沒有任何別的義務(wù)了。任何時候如果我們發(fā)生了爭執(zhí)，不要指望和依賴通過利用我本性中的任何弱點來達成妥協(xié)，很多孩子經(jīng)常這樣做，只有那些愚蠢的家長才吃這一套，我沒有這樣的弱點。除了一些最本質(zhì)的關(guān)鍵點之外，我永遠(yuǎn)都不會與你爭吵，一旦我們發(fā)生爭吵，我永不原諒你。但我希望也相信：我的上述宣言(不是威脅)將被證明是多慮了。你對美德的原則應(yīng)該是不陌生的，而且每一個了解美德的人都必定會熱愛美德。
關(guān)于知識，盡管你已經(jīng)擁有了相當(dāng)?shù)闹R，但還是要努力去掌握更多。只有無知的人才會要么鄙視知識，要么認(rèn)為他們的知識已足夠：那些擁有最多知識的人卻還一直起學(xué)更多，而且他們明白自己所擁有的最大的知識就是知道自己懂得的太少了。
時不時地回想回想，然后記住我給你的這些友好的建議，你將從中獲益良多。
內(nèi)容簡介
查斯特菲爾德勛爵給他的獨生子菲利蒲的信，成為有史以來最受推崇的家書，被譽為“一部使人脫胎換骨的道德和禮儀全書”。牛津大學(xué)出版社更是將其列入該社《世界經(jīng)典》之一。這本書世世代代流行于英國上流社會，被譽為紳士們的“教科書”。您在通讀全書后將會發(fā)現(xiàn)，它傾注了世間親情和人類智慧，是一部教人如何獲得他人信任，如何取得成功的經(jīng)典之作。對于正在融入世界一體化的國人來講，查斯特菲爾德勛爵傳授的這些“入世”知識，列疑會成為你步入“高貴”、取得成功的護照。
作者簡介
查斯特菲爾德勛爵(1694-1773)
英國著名政治家、外交家及文學(xué)家。他曾就讀于劍橋大學(xué)，并游學(xué)歐洲大陸，1726年繼承爵位，1728年出使荷蘭，曾任愛爾蘭總督及國務(wù)大臣等職位。并與他同時代的文學(xué)家波普、艾略特、愛迪生、斯威夫特等過往甚密。
查斯特菲爾德勛爵留給世人最寶貴的財富，是他集幾十年的心血，寫給兒子菲利普?斯坦霍普及教子的信。在他的諄諄教誨下，其子也成為一名杰出的外交家。
這本書世世代代流行于英國上流社會，被譽為紳士們的“教科書”。牛津大學(xué)出版社更是將其列入該社《世界經(jīng)典》之一。本書在日本出版后曾刮起一股旋風(fēng)。相信中文版的問世，能讓讀者分享前人經(jīng)驗累積而成的智慧，助你邁向成功的人生。
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