簡(jiǎn)單英文笑話小短文欣賞

　　明清笑話結(jié)集者帶著牢騷郁結(jié)的心態(tài),以嘻笑怒罵皆成文章為動(dòng)機(jī),使笑話承擔(dān)著度世的教化職責(zé)。下面小編整理了簡(jiǎn)單英文笑話小短文，希望大家喜歡!

　　簡(jiǎn)單英文笑話小短文品析

　　你跑到哪兒去了?

　　Once upon a time, there was a man who always forgot things. One day, he went out with hislittle son. He was so happy that he put the son ride his neck.

　　After a time, he suddenly thought of his son, he asked people: "Have you seen my child?"

　　One of his villagers laughed and said: "Don't you know he is on your neck?"

　　Hearing this, the man took down his son from his neck, he was so angry that he hit the sonon the face, then shouted: "I have told you not to go here and there. Where did you go justnow?"

　　原來(lái)有個(gè)人記性極差。一天，他帶著小兒子出去玩。一高興，便把小兒子舉起來(lái)，讓他騎在自己的脖子上。

　　過(guò)了一會(huì)兒，他忽然想起兒子來(lái)，逢人便問(wèn)：“你看到我孩子了嗎?”

　　“哎，你脖子上的那個(gè)不是嗎?”有個(gè)鄰居見了大笑。

　　這個(gè)人一把將小兒子從脖子上揪下來(lái)，狠狠地打了一耳光，罵道：“混蛋，叫你別亂跑，剛才你到哪里去了?”

　　經(jīng)典簡(jiǎn)單英文笑話小短文

　　兩條比目魚

　　Simon was an inveterate fisherman, well known for exaggerating the size of "the one that gotaway". But there came a day when he actually caught two enormous flounders. He immediatelyinvited a few friends over to dine, then tried to figure out how best to serve the fish." If I useboth," he told his wife, "it will seem ostentatious."

　　"Why not serve a piece of each?" she suggested.

　　"No, if I cut them up, nobody will believe I caught two giant flounders." Simon racked hisbrain. Then he had an idea.

　　The guests were seated at the table when their host strode in with a platter, holding thebiggest flounder they'd ever seen. Suddenly Simon stumbled and fell. Everyone cried out indismay as the fish crashed to the floor, but Simon quickly brushed himself off.

　　"Dear, " he called out to his wife, "bring in the other flounder!"

　　西蒙是個(gè)老練的漁夫。人們都熟知他愛吹噓“跑掉的那條”魚的尺寸。但有一天他確實(shí)抓了兩條極大的比目魚。他立刻邀請(qǐng)幾個(gè)朋友過(guò)來(lái)吃飯，然后著力搞清楚怎樣將魚端上餐桌。“如果同時(shí)端上2條魚,”他對(duì)妻子說(shuō)，“好像有點(diǎn)炫耀之嫌了。”

　　“何不兩條魚各上一小塊呢?”他妻子建議道。

　　“不行，如果把兩條魚都切碎了，就不會(huì)有人相信我抓了兩條大比目魚了。”西蒙絞盡了腦汁，終于想出了一個(gè)好辦法。

　　客人已在餐桌邊就座完畢，這時(shí)主人大步地走進(jìn)來(lái)，手里端著一個(gè)托盤，托盤上是一個(gè)他們所見過(guò)的最大的比目魚。突然西蒙被什么東西絆了一下摔倒了。所有的人都驚慌地叫了起來(lái)，因?yàn)轸~在地板上摔得粉碎。但是西蒙迅速地?cái)[脫了窘境。

　　“親愛的，”他對(duì)妻子喊道，“把另一條魚端上來(lái)!”

　　關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)單英文笑話小短文

　　特別的旅游

　　One stupid guy reads an ad about a vacation cruise that costs only $ 100.After he signs upand pays, the travel agent hits him with a bat, knocks him unconscious and throws him outthe back door into the river. Soon another guy comes in, pays his fee and gets the sametreatment

　　Fifteen minutes later, as the two are floating down the river together, the first man says, "Iwonder if they're serving any food on this cruise."

　　"I don' t know, the second guy replied. "They didn't last year."

　　一個(gè)愚笨的人讀到一則假日巡航游只須花100元的廣告。在他簽了字付了款后，旅游經(jīng)紀(jì)人用棒猛擊了他一下，把他打昏了過(guò)去，并把他從后門扔進(jìn)了河里。不久又來(lái)了一個(gè)人，付了錢并得到了相同的待遇。

　　十五分鐘后，這兩個(gè)人一起向河的下游漂去。第一個(gè)人說(shuō)：“不知道他們這次巡航游是否提供食物。”

　　“不知道，”第二個(gè)人說(shuō)道，“去年是沒(méi)有的。”

　　簡(jiǎn)單英文笑話小短文欣賞

　　問(wèn)題出在哪里

　　A Japanese company and an American company had a boat race, the Japanese won by a mile.The Americans hired analysts to figure out what went wrong. They reported that the Japanesehad one person managing and seven rowing, while the Americans had seven managing and onlyone rowing. The American company immediately restructured its team. Now they had onesenior manager, six management consultants and one rower.

　　In the rematch the Japanese won by two miles. So the American company fired the rower.

　　一家日本公司和一家美國(guó)公司進(jìn)行了一場(chǎng)劃船比賽。日本隊(duì)贏了一英里。美國(guó)人便請(qǐng)來(lái)了分析家探討問(wèn)題出在哪里。他們的報(bào)告說(shuō)日本隊(duì)有一人掌舵七人劃槳，而美國(guó)隊(duì)是七人掌舵一人劃槳。美國(guó)公司立刻對(duì)隊(duì)伍進(jìn)行了重組。這次他們有一個(gè)高級(jí)舵手、六個(gè)舵手顧問(wèn)、一個(gè)劃槳員。

　　在第二次比賽中，日本隊(duì)贏了兩英里。因此，美國(guó)公司解雇了劃槳員。