適合小學(xué)啟蒙階段的英語(yǔ)小笑話謎語(yǔ)

　　與一般日常會(huì)話不同,笑話刻意違反合作原則,由此衍生出會(huì)話含意,并利用會(huì)話含意之間的沖突實(shí)現(xiàn)其預(yù)定功能。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來(lái)的適合小學(xué)啟蒙階段的英語(yǔ)小笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　適合小學(xué)啟蒙階段的英語(yǔ)小笑話精選

　　(一)

　　給我捎杯牛奶

　　At 2 a. m. Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living-room. Tiptoedown-stairs, she told her husband, "Don' t turn on the lights. Sneak up him before he knowswhat's happening."Dutifully Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door,his wife added, "And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk."

　　半夜兩點(diǎn)，科爾肯太太確信聽(tīng)到客廳有賊，便對(duì)丈夫說(shuō)：“別開(kāi)燈，躡手躡腳下樓，別讓賊發(fā)覺(jué)，悄悄靠近他。” 科爾肯先生披上外套，責(zé)無(wú)旁貸地去捉賊。剛走到臥室門(mén)口，他妻子又補(bǔ)充說(shuō)：“回來(lái)時(shí)給我捎杯牛奶。”

　　(二)

　　跟媽媽一模一樣的女朋友

　　No matter which girls he brought home, the young man found disapproval from his mother. Afriend gave him advice."Find a girl just like your mother -- then, she's bound to like her."　　Sothe young man searched and searched, and finally found the girl. He told his friendlyadviser:"Just like you said, I found a girl who looked, talked, dressed, and even cooked likemother, And just as you said, mother liked her".　　"So," asked the friend, "whathappened?""Nothing," said the young man. " My father hates her!".

　　有個(gè)小伙子發(fā)現(xiàn)，無(wú)論他帶什么女孩子回家，媽媽都不贊成。一位朋友建議他，“你找一個(gè)像你母親一樣的女孩吧——你母親肯定會(huì)喜歡她的”。這個(gè)小伙子就找啊找啊，終于找到了一個(gè)女孩。他告訴自己的朋友：“就像你說(shuō)的，我找到了一個(gè)女孩，無(wú)論在感覺(jué)、說(shuō)話、打扮，甚至烹飪手藝都很像母親的，而且真的像你說(shuō)的那樣，媽媽很喜歡她。”“那么，”他的朋友問(wèn)到，“發(fā)生了什么事?”“沒(méi)事，”小伙子說(shuō)，我父親很討厭她!”

　　適合小學(xué)啟蒙階段的英語(yǔ)小笑話閱讀

　　(一)

　　那個(gè)"甜嘴"老公的真相

　　Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request tohis wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc.　伯尼被邀請(qǐng)到朋友家吃晚餐。莫里斯，也是請(qǐng)客的主人，在每個(gè)客人面前都稱他的妻子為親愛(ài)的、我的愛(ài)人、甜心等等。

　　Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that youhave been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head andwhispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."

　　伯尼于是對(duì)莫里斯說(shuō)：“你真是很好，結(jié)婚這么多年后，你還是喊你妻子這么甜蜜的名字。”莫里斯則彎下腰來(lái)對(duì)伯尼輕聲說(shuō)：“告訴你實(shí)情吧，我3年前就忘記她的名字了。”

　　(二)

　　一公司的奸商

　　When my printer's type began to go faint, I called a repair shop where a friendly man told methat the printer probably needed only to be cleaned.

　　由于我的打印機(jī)不能打印出清晰的字來(lái)，我就打電話給維修部。電話是一位非常和藹的男人接的，他說(shuō)我的打印機(jī)也許只是需要清理一下。

　　Because the shop charged 50 pounds for such cleanings, he told me, it would be better for meto read the printer's directions and try the job myself.

　　他還說(shuō)，如果讓維修部清理的話要交50英鎊的清理費(fèi)，讓我最好看看使用手冊(cè)自己試著清理。

　　Pleasantly surprised by his words, I asked, "Does your boss know that you discouragebusiness?"

　　當(dāng)時(shí)我真的被他的話感動(dòng)了，就問(wèn)他：“你們老板知道你這樣拒絕生意么?”

　　"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied. "We usually make more money on repairs ifwe let people try to repair things themselves first."

　　“事實(shí)上，這就是我們老板的主意，”雇員答道：“因?yàn)槿绻覀冏層脩粝茸孕行蘩泶蛴C(jī)的話就能掙更多的錢(qián)。”

　　關(guān)于適合小學(xué)啟蒙階段的英語(yǔ)小笑話

　　(一)

　　相親,逃跑的好借口

　　After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.

　　和相親對(duì)象呆了一晚上后，男人再也受不了了。

　　Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have anexcuse to leave.

　　他事先安排了個(gè)朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開(kāi)了。

　　When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I havesome bad news. My grandfather just died."

　　當(dāng)他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說(shuō)：“有個(gè)不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛?cè)ナ懒恕?rdquo;

　　"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

　　“謝天謝地!”他的約會(huì)對(duì)象說(shuō)，“如果你的祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了!”

　　(二)

　　奈何娶妻不慎

　　Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physician motioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.

　　一個(gè)人得了重病，妻子伴隨他去看醫(yī)生。檢查過(guò)后，醫(yī)生示意病人的妻子到走廊見(jiàn)他。

　　"Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do to ensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him a stress-free environment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate love to him every day.

　　“你丈夫病得很重，”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“但有三件事可保住他的性命。第一，一日三餐，要營(yíng)養(yǎng)美味。第二，給他一個(gè)輕松的環(huán)境，不要抱怨。第三，每天都對(duì)他傾注熾熱的愛(ài)。”

　　On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?"

　　在驅(qū)車回家的路上，丈夫問(wèn)道：“醫(yī)生說(shuō)了什么?”

　　"I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it.

　　“很遺憾，”她說(shuō)，“你活不成了。”