關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話
關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話
在交際場(chǎng)合,能恰到好處地講個(gè)笑話或自創(chuàng)一個(gè)幽默,不僅可以體現(xiàn)自己的語(yǔ)言水平,還可以提升個(gè)人魅力。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來(lái)的關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話,歡迎閱讀!
關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話篇一
A Regimen 養(yǎng)生之道
An old man of seventy-six went to a doctor to request a general check up as to the state of his health.
The doctor looked him up thoroughly1, and then told him: "Everything is fine." As the old man paid his fee, the doctor asked him: "Have you followed any regimen to help you keepphysically2 fit?"
"Well," replied the old man, "when I was married fifty years ago, I made an agreement with my wife that when I lost my temper3 and easily got angry, she would remain silent and when she lost her temper, I would leave the house. So for over fifty years I had enjoyed a fine outdoor life. That no doubt is the season why I can keep physically fit."
一個(gè)76歲的老頭去找醫(yī)生給他做一次常規(guī)體檢,以了解他的健康狀況。
醫(yī)生給他仔細(xì)檢查后告訴他:“一切都很好。”老人繳費(fèi)的時(shí)候,醫(yī)生問(wèn)他:“你有什么養(yǎng)生之道幫助你保持健康呢?”
老頭回答道:“哦,50年前結(jié)婚時(shí)我就和妻子約定:當(dāng)我生氣了,容易發(fā)怒的時(shí)候,她要保持沉默;而當(dāng)她生氣時(shí),我就出門(mén)去。于是我得以享受了50多年美好的戶外生活。這一點(diǎn)就是能夠使我保持健康的原因。”
關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話篇二
A Pretentious Scholar 自命不凡的學(xué)者
A pretentious1(自命不凡的) scholar was keen to show off. One day when he was being rowed across a stream, he asked the boatman: "Do you understand philosophy?"
"No, sir, " said the boatman. "Then, " said the scholar, "one-fourth of your life is gone." After a while he asked again, "Do you know geology?" "Nothing at all," said the boatman.
"Well, that makes one half of your life gone," said the scholar. Just then the boat suddenly tipped over. The boatman asked: "Can you swim?"
The scholor said, gasping2 for breath: "No." "Then your whole life is gone," said the boatman.
有個(gè)自命不凡的學(xué)者和喜歡賣弄。有一天他乘一只小船過(guò)河去時(shí),問(wèn)船夫:“你懂哲學(xué)嗎?” 船夫說(shuō):“不懂哇,先生。”
學(xué)者就說(shuō):“那你的一生有四分之一算完了。”過(guò)了一會(huì)兒他又問(wèn):“你知道地質(zhì)學(xué)嗎?” 船夫說(shuō):“一點(diǎn)也不懂。”學(xué)者就說(shuō):“那你的一生的已有一半算完了。”
就在這時(shí),小船忽然翻了,船夫問(wèn)學(xué)者:“你會(huì)游水嗎?”學(xué)者喘著氣說(shuō):“不會(huì)啊。”
船夫說(shuō):“那你的一生就全完啦。”
關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話篇三
It was unnecessary 沒(méi)有必要
A man stopped at a place where a subscription1(捐獻(xiàn)) was being raised for the purpose of fencing the cemetery2(墓地). A lot of people had made a donation.
The man thought it was unnessary to do so. He said, "I have two reasons. In the first place, no one in the cemetery can get out; and in the second place, no one out want to get in."
有一個(gè)人在一個(gè)地方停了下來(lái),看到那里正在為墓地建造一道柵欄募集捐款。很多人捐了錢(qián)。
這個(gè)人認(rèn)為沒(méi)有必要這樣做。他說(shuō):“我有兩個(gè)理由,首先,墓地里的人沒(méi)有一個(gè)人能夠出來(lái);其次,外面的人也沒(méi)有一個(gè)會(huì)想進(jìn)去。”
關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話篇四
The most wanted autograph 最想要的簽名
Our university newspaper runs a weekly question feature. Recently, the question was: "Whose autograph would you most want to have, and why?" As expected, most responses mentioned music or sports stars, or politicians. The best response came from a freshman1, who said, "The person who signs my diploma."
我們大學(xué)的校報(bào)開(kāi)辦了一個(gè)每周一問(wèn)的專欄。上周的問(wèn)題是:“你最想要什么人的簽名?為什么?”和預(yù)計(jì)的一樣,大部分的回答都是歌星、體育明星或者政治家。但是,最優(yōu)秀的答案來(lái)自一個(gè)一年級(jí)新生,他說(shuō):“在我畢業(yè)證上簽字的那個(gè)人。”
關(guān)于用英語(yǔ)表達(dá)的笑話篇五
It might be the light
Deep In the back woods of Tennessee, a hillbilly's wife went into labor1 in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said, "Here. You hold this high so I can see what I am doing."
Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. "Hey there," said the doctor, "Don't be in such a rush to put that lantern down. I think there's another one coming." Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl. "Hold that lantern up, don't set it down there's another one!" said the doctor.
Within a few minutes he had delivered a third baby. "No, don't be in a hurry to put down that lantern, it seems there's yet another one coming!" cried the doctor. The redneck scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, "You reckon it might be the light that's attracting them?
在田納西州叢林的深處,一個(gè)鄉(xiāng)下人的妻子半夜時(shí)分臨產(chǎn),一名醫(yī)生被叫來(lái)幫手接生。 因?yàn)槟莻€(gè)地方?jīng)]有通電,醫(yī)生把燈籠遞給那個(gè)快要當(dāng)爸爸的農(nóng)夫,說(shuō),“把這個(gè)高高舉著,這樣,我好干活”。
很快,一名男嬰降臨到這人世界上。 “嘿”,醫(yī)生說(shuō),“別著急把燈籠放下來(lái),我覺(jué)得還有一個(gè)小孩要生出來(lái)。”,果然,沒(méi)幾分鐘,醫(yī)生又接生了一個(gè)嬰兒,這回是個(gè)女孩。“燈籠舉高點(diǎn),不要坐下來(lái),還有”,醫(yī)生說(shuō)。
又過(guò)了幾分鐘,第三個(gè)孩子降生了。 “別,別著急放下燈籠,看來(lái),還有一個(gè)要出來(lái)!”,醫(yī)生不由得驚叫起來(lái)。 鄉(xiāng)下人撓頭抓耳,不明白是怎么回事,于是問(wèn)醫(yī)生,“你覺(jué)得是不是,這些小家伙看到光所以爬出來(lái)了?”
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