初二好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話大全
笑話是日常生活中人們消遣娛樂的一種常見語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,其目的在于在會(huì)話過程中傳遞和激發(fā)幽默感。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的初二好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話，歡迎閱讀!
初二好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇一
Gardening Glove
園藝手套
For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an allergy to gold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I held my hands up and said, "Well, you'll notice that my hands are bare."
幾個(gè)月以來，我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的結(jié)婚戒指，因?yàn)槲覍?duì)黃金有點(diǎn)過敏。生日那天，我正在干園藝活時(shí)，丈夫問我想要什么禮物，我舉起雙手說：“嗯，你肯定看到了，我的兩手都是光光的。”
Later that evening I opened my present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped(打開) a new pair of gardening glove.
那天晚上，我滿懷熱情地拆開了丈夫送的禮物，“生日快樂!”他說。我打開一看：里面包著一雙園藝手套。
初二好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇二
Talking clock
會(huì)說話的鐘
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den(私室，賊窩) . What is the big brass gong(鑼) and hammer for? one of his friends asked. That is the talking clock, the man replied. How's it work?
一個(gè)學(xué)生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓，甚是得意。那個(gè)大銅鑼和錘子是干什么用的?他的一個(gè)朋友問他。那玩意兒厲害了，那是一個(gè)會(huì)說話的鐘，學(xué)生回答。這鐘怎么工作的，他的朋友問。
Watch, the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!
看著，別眨眼了，那學(xué)生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子，拼命地敲了一下，聲音震耳欲聾。突然，他們聽到隔壁墻那邊有人狂叫，別敲了，你這白癡!現(xiàn)在是凌晨?jī)牲c(diǎn)鐘了!
初二好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇三
My father, who was 14 years old than my mother, had been working on his will. At a family dinner he told us that he had provided well for mother, but the family home would go to us five children if she remarried.
我爸比我媽大14歲，最近一直在寫遺囑。一次家宴上，他告訴我們說他為母親以后的生活作好了安排，但如果她改嫁的話，家里的房子將歸我們五個(gè)孩子所有。
"I don't want another S.O.B. toasting his shins(小腿骨) around my fireplace," he explained.
“我可不愿意另外哪個(gè)狗娘養(yǎng)的在我的火爐旁烤他的狗腿，”他解釋道。
With a sly grin, Mother cracked, "What makes you think I'd marry another S.O.B?"
媽媽狡猾地咧了咧嘴，譏誚道：“你怎么認(rèn)為我會(huì)再嫁給一個(gè)狗娘養(yǎng)的?”
初二好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇四
Three competing store owners rented adjoining(毗連的) shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem(故意的傷害罪，蓄意的破壞) to ensue.
三個(gè)互相爭(zhēng)生意的商店老板在一條商業(yè)街上租用了毗鄰的店鋪，旁觀者等著瞧好戲。
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, Gigantic Sale! and Super Bargains!
右邊的零售商掛起了巨大的招牌，上書：大減價(jià)!特便宜!
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, Prices Slashed! and Fantastic Discounts!
左邊的商店掛出了更大的招牌，聲稱：大砍價(jià)!大折扣!
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, ENTRANCE.
中間的商人隨后準(zhǔn)備了一個(gè)大招牌，上面只簡(jiǎn)單地寫著：入口處。
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