1分鐘好笑的英語笑話演講
笑話是指幽默的話語。從結構上看 ,一則話語只要具有能產生幽默效果的關鍵語句即成笑話 ;笑話中人物對“合作原則”四準則有意無意的違反常常產生幽默。下面是學習啦小編帶來的1分鐘好笑的英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!
1分鐘好笑的英語笑話篇一
讓人崩潰的駕駛
A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?""No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a ,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's a smartass when he's drunk and stoned(醉酒的) ."The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk(行李箱) and a muffled(聽不清的) voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"
一個家伙開車的時候警察追了上來。這個家伙要開窗戶問警察：“怎么了，警官?”
“沒事，我觀察到了你的安全駕駛技術，很高興你獲得了價值5000美元的安全駕駛獎。祝賀你!你認為你要拿這筆錢去做什么?”
他想了一會說“哦，我覺得，我應該去考駕照”。
坐在副駕駛位的女士說"別在意他說的，他喝醉了酒說胡話呢.“
后面座位的家伙說”我告訴你，偷來的車我們走不遠的。“
此時，行李箱出現(xiàn)了敲擊聲并傳出一個模糊不清的聲音：“我們穿過了邊境了嗎?”
1分鐘好笑的英語笑話篇二
Wedding or Not
Uncle Frank, at 79, was a healthy and wealthy man, a lifelong bachelor. He courted a lot, he said, but "never boiled over-just simmered." On a whim, he decided to take a trip around the country to look up nearly a dozen old girlfriends.
Upon his return he exclaimed, "Whew! Thank goodness I never married any of those women - They're all widows now!
弗蘭克叔叔七十八歲了，富有而健康。他是個終生單身漢。他曾追求過很多女孩，但“從不過熱----見好就收”。一天他突發(fā)奇想，決定四處走走，去看看他那些接近一打的舊時女友。
他回來即嘆道：“噓!謝天謝地幸虧我沒娶那些女人中的任何一個。如今她們都成寡婦了!”
1分鐘好笑的英語笑話篇三
A Boy with a Big Head大頭娃娃
A boy cried to his mother, "All the children make fun of me. They say I have a big head."
"Don't listen to them," his mother said, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store to buy twenty pounds of patotoes."
"Where is the shopping bag?"
"I haven't got one-use your hat."
一個小男孩向他母親哭訴道：“他們都取笑我，說我腦袋大。” “別聽他們的，”他母親安慰道，“你有一個很漂亮的腦袋。好啦，別哭了，去商店買十斤土豆來。”
“購物袋在哪兒?”
“沒購物袋了----就用你的帽子吧。”
1分鐘好笑的英語笑話篇四
A Small Surprise 小小的意外
When his wife was expecting their third child, a father decided to tell his two sons, ages seven and nine, the facts of life. He checked out several books from the library on how parents should approach the subject. After stumbling through an explanation, he took a deep breath, and said, "Now, boys, do you have any questions?"
"Yes," the younger boy answered immediately.
"Go ahead," said the man, his heart in his throat.
"Can we," his son asked, "have new baseball gloves?"
當妻子要生第三胎時，父親決定給分別已七歲和九歲的兩個兒子講關于性的知識。他從圖書館查出幾本書，都是關于父母如何涉及這個話題的。在結結巴巴地解釋一番后，他長出了一口氣，然后說：“好了，孩子們，有什么問題嗎?”
“有，”小兒子立即回答。 “問吧，”爸爸說，心提到了嗓子眼兒。
“我們，”兒子問道，“可以得到新棒球手套了嗎?”
1分鐘好笑的英語笑話篇五
All Right 沒關系
Hurrying my 11-year old daughter to school, I made a right turn at a red light when it was prohibited. Uh-oh, I said, realizing my mistake. I just make an illegal turn.I guess it's all right, my daughter replied, The police car behind us did the same thing.
我趕著開車將11歲的女兒送到學校去，在紅燈處右拐了，而那是不允許的(譯注:在一些國家如英國,其交通規(guī)則是車輛左行的,與我國相反)。啊噢，意識到犯了錯誤，我說。我剛才拐彎是違章的。我想那沒關系的，女兒回答說：我們后面的警車也同樣拐了彎。
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