簡短的英語笑話
簡短的英語笑話
笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事類型,材料豐富,有廣泛的現(xiàn)實基礎(chǔ)。小編精心收集了簡短的英語笑話,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
簡短的英語笑話:A Stubborn Horse
The great novelist had gone mad, but now there seemed to be some hope for his recovery. For six months, he had been sitting at his typewriter pounding out a novel. Finally, he pronounced it completed and brought the book to his psychiatrist, who eagerly began reading it aloud:
"General Jackson leaped upon his faithful horse and yelled, 'Giddyap, giddyap, giddyap, giddyap"' The doctor thumbed through the rest of the manuscript." There's nothing here but 500 pages of giddyaps! " he exclaimed."
"Stubborn horse," explained the writer.
倔強的馬
大作家瘋了,但現(xiàn)在似乎還有恢復(fù)的希望。六個月以來,他都坐在打字機旁用力地敲一部小說。終于,他宣稱書已寫好并把它拿到精神病醫(yī)生那里。醫(yī)生急切地大聲朗讀起來:
“杰克遜將軍跨上他的忠實的馬,喊道:‘駕,駕,駕,駕……’”醫(yī)生翻了翻剩下的手稿。“五百頁紙竟全是‘駕,駕’!”他驚奇地說。
“是匹倔強的馬,”作家解釋道。
簡短的英語笑話:Looking for a companion
A bachelor asked the computer to find him the perfect mate: ' I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports and enjoys group activities. "
Back came the answer: "Marry a penguin. "
Looking for a companion
A bachelor asked the computer to find him the perfect mate: ' I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports and enjoys group activities. "
Back came the answer: "Marry a penguin. "
簡短的英語笑話:My Roommate
My roommate was interested in a young man in her English-literature class, but she was too shy to let him know. One day she overheard him say he was on his way to the library for a certain book. She rushed to the library, found the book and stuck in it a letter from her mother.
"Why would he want to read a letter from your mother?" I asked.
"He wouldn't, but if he's any kind of gentleman, he'll return it to me " Her dorm and room numbers were on the envelope, of course.
The next day he appeared with the letter and asked my roommate out on a date. "Couldn't fail," she later told me. "The book was Great Expectations.
簡短的英語笑話:12 Post Cards
My teen-age daughter was preparing to return home after having visited her grandparents for a few weeks one summer. Her grandfather gave her 12 post cards .
"Here, write us a few lines every month," he said.
Months passed and the cards remained unused-that is until the day this letter arrived:
"Dear Jennifer,
Life is a series of stages.
As a child, I looked forward to becoming a teenager-that happened.
As a teen-ager ,I looked forward to becoming a young man-that happened.
As a young man, I looked forward to meeting a young woman, in love and becoming a married man-that happened.
As a married man, I looked forward to becoming a father-that happened.
As a father, I looked forward to becoming a grandfather to beautiful ,intelligent grandchildren-that happened.
Then I looked forward to the day they would learn to write-that hasn't happened yet.
十二張卡片
一個夏天,我十多歲的女兒在她祖父母家過了幾周。她準(zhǔn)備回家時,祖父給了她十二張卡片。
“每月給我們來個短信,”他說。
幾個月過去了,可卡片一直放在那兒沒用----直到有一天來了這樣一封信:
“親愛的詹妮芙:
生活是一系列階段組成的。
還是個孩子的時候,我期待著成為一個青少年----我如愿以償了。
還是個年輕人的時候,我期待著遇到一個年輕的女人,戀愛、結(jié)婚----我如愿以償了。
結(jié)了婚,我便期待著成為一個父親----我如愿以償了。
作為父親,我期待著成為一個祖父,有漂亮、聰明的孫兒孫女----我也如愿以償了。
接著,我期待著有一天他們能給我寫信----我卻還沒有如愿以償。
簡短的英語笑話:Get a Job
One day shortly after I had come home from college, my father was outside doing yard work. He found a baby bird under a tree and assumed it had fallen from its nest. Wanting to return the tiny creature to its home, my dad went to get a ladder . When he got back, he found another baby bird on the ground.
Suddenly he heard a loud chirping from above. Looking up, my father saw the mother bird giving a third baby the boot from its nest. With that, Dad walked into our house, took one look at me watching television and barked, "Get a job!"
找個工作
一天,我剛剛從學(xué)院回到家里,我父親正在院子里面做活。他發(fā)現(xiàn)樹下有一個雛鳥,猜想可能是從窩里掉下來的。父親便去搬梯子,他想把這個小東西送回它的家。梯子搬來了,可父親發(fā)現(xiàn)地上又多了一個雛鳥。
突然他聽到樹上有大聲的唧唧聲。父親抬起頭,看見母鳥正在把第三只雛鳥往巢外踢。
看到這些,父親走進屋,看了一眼在看電視的我,大聲叫道:“找個工作去!”
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