初中一年級(jí)英語笑話閱讀

時(shí)間：2016-11-16 14:27:41 韋彥867由分享

　　笑話使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松。與此同時(shí),笑話也是人們反對(duì)極權(quán)和專制制度的有力武器。小編精心收集了初中一年級(jí)英語笑話，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

　　初中一年級(jí)英語笑話：Purpose of the Dog

　　A Sunday School helper was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children began discussing the dog's duties.

　　"They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.

　　"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."

　　A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

　　初中一年級(jí)英語笑話：Doggie Funeral

　　This rich man died and left in his will that when his dog died he was to have a funeral and who ever did the funeral would get a million dollars.

　　When the dog died--the executor started asking various faiths of the cloth if they would do the funeral. All refused. Finally he asked this old country preacher if he would do the funeral. "Why Brother--I don't do dogs funerals!"

　　"OK" the executor replied, "But the one who does this funeral gets a fat one million dollars!". The preacher replied "Now wait a Minute --- you didn't tell me this dog was a Christian!"

　　初中一年級(jí)英語笑話：Cross-eyed Rottweiler

　　A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to the vet: "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for it?"

　　"Well" said the vet "lets have a look at him"

　　So he picks the dog up and has a good look at it's eyes.

　　"Well" says the vet "I'm going to have to put him down"

　　"Just because he's cross-eyed?" says the man.

　　"No, because he's heavy" says the vet.

　　初中一年級(jí)英語笑話：I Cant Let Him Get Away

　　A male crab(螃蟹) met a female crab and asked her to marry him. She noticed that he was walking straight instead of sideways. Wow, she thought, this crab is really special. I can't let him get away .So they got married immediately.

　　The next day she noticed her new husband waking sideways like all the other crabs, and got upset. "What happened?" she asked. "You used to walk straight before we were married."

　　"Oh, honey, " he replied, "I can't drink that much every day.

　　不能讓他跑了

　　一只雄蟹遇到一只雌蟹，便要娶她為妻。她注意到他走路是直著走，而不是橫著走。哇!她想，這只雄蟹可真特別，我可不能讓他跑了。因此他們立刻結(jié)婚了。

　　第二天，她又發(fā)現(xiàn)她的新郎像其他蟹一樣橫著走路了。她深感不安。“你怎么了?”她問，“我們結(jié)婚前你可是直著走路的。”

　　“哦，寶貝，”他回答說，“我不可能每天都喝那么多。”

　　初中一年級(jí)英語笑話：Skunk

　　"We have a skunk(臭鼬) in the basement," shrieked(尖叫) the caller to the police dispatcher(警察調(diào)度員) . "How can we get it out?"

　　"Take some bread crumbs(面包碎屑) ," said the dispatcher, "and put down a trail from the basement out to the back yard. Then leave the cellar door open."

　　Sometime later the resident called back. "Did you get rid of it?" asked the dispatcher.

　　"No," replied the caller. "Now I have two skunks in there!"

　　
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