經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話
經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話
冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語言現(xiàn)象,它輕松詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕松的情趣,它一出現(xiàn)便受到了大多數(shù)人的喜愛。小編精心收集了經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話:Wishing Well
A couple is taking a stroll in a lovely meadow when they come upon a wishing well. The woman leans over, makes a wish, and throws in a quarter.
Her husband decides he wants to make a wish, also. Unfortunately, he leans over too far, falls down into the well, and drowns.
The woman stands there shaken for a moment, and then exclaims, "BLOODY HELL, IT WORKS!!!"
經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話:Husbands' Nicknames
Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their love lives.
One woman said, "I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does."
The second woman giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft."
The third woman quietly sipped her whiskey until her friend asked, "Say, what do you call your husband?"
She frowned and said, "The postman."
"Why the postman?"
"Because he always delivers late, and half the time it's in the wrong box."
經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話:100 Nuns
The head Nun of the convent called all 100 Nuns into the foyer for an emergency meeting.
"Last night," She started "I found something terrible in one of the sisters rooms."
99 Nuns "Oh no"
1 Nun "He, he"
"A condom!" said the head Nun.
99 Nuns "Oh no"
1 Nun "He, he"
Head Nun "And it was used!"
99 Nuns "Oh no"
1 Nun "He, he"
Head Nun "And it had a hole in it!"
1 Nun "Oh no"
99 Nuns "He, he"
經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話: Who's That Dog?
There was a hound dog laying in the yard and an old geezer in overalls was sitting on the porch. ''Excuse me, sir, but does your dog bite?'' a tourist asked. The old man looked up over his newspaper and replied, ''Nope.'' As soon as the tourist stepped out of his car, the dog begansnarling and growling, and then attacked both his arms and legs. As the tourist flailedaround in the dust, he yelled, ''I thought you said your dog didn't bite!'' The old man muttered, ''Ain't my dog.''
經(jīng)典爆笑簡單英語笑話:Six Feet Under The Sheets
Marge was in bed with a man (not her husband). All of a sudden, they heard a noise downstairs. "Oh, my God, your husband is home! What am I going to do?" "Just stay in bed with me. He's probably so drunk, he ain't gonna notice you here with me." The fear of getting caught trying to escape was more powerful than the thought of getting caught in bed with Marge, so he trusted her advice. Sure enough, Marge's husband came crawling into bed and as he pulled the covers over him, he pulled the blankets, exposing six feet. "Honey!" he yelled. "What the hell is going on? I see six feet at the end of the bed!" "Dear, you're so drunk, you can't count. If you don't believe me, count them again." The husband got out of bed, and counted. "One, two, three, four... By gosh, you're right, dear!"
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