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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話 > 超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話欣賞

超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話欣賞

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話欣賞

  英語(yǔ)笑話是一種重要的交際手段,在人們的日常生活中起著重要作用,既能讓人放松身心,又能拉近彼此距離。本文是超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話,希望對(duì)大家有幫助!

  超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話:This is marriage all about

  My wife-to-be and I were at the county clerk's office for our marriage license. After recording the vital information — names, dates of birth, etc. — the clerk handed me our license and deadpanned, "No refunds, no exchanges, no warranties."

  婚姻就是這么一回事

  我和未婚妻在縣辦公室領(lǐng)結(jié)婚證。在記錄完重要信息——名字,出生日期,等后——辦事員遞給我結(jié)婚證,臉無(wú)表情地說(shuō),“不退錢(qián),不包換,不保修。”

  超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話:承諾的結(jié)果

  Father: I promised to buy you a car if you passed your examination, and you have failed. Whatwere you doing last term?

  父親:我曾向你許諾,如果你考試及格就給你買(mǎi)倆小汽車(chē),可你卻未能做到。你上學(xué)期一直在干什么呀?

  Son: I was learning to drive a car.

  兒子:我在學(xué)開(kāi)汽車(chē)。

  超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話:你爸爸幫你做作業(yè)了嗎?

  One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all hissums right.

  一天,蒂姆的數(shù)學(xué)老師看了他的作業(yè),發(fā)現(xiàn)他全做對(duì)了。

  The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised.

  老師很高興,同時(shí)也十分驚訝。

  He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. Whathappened? Did your father help you?"

  他把蒂姆叫到桌前說(shuō):"蒂姆,你這次的作業(yè)全都做對(duì)了,怎么回事?你爸爸幫你做了嗎?"

  "No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim."

  "不,先生,我爸爸昨天很忙,我不得不全由自己做。"

  超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話:什么都有,你要買(mǎi)什么?

  A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma'am, we haven't had any for a while, and itdoesn't look as if we'll be getting soon.

  一個(gè)商店經(jīng)理聽(tīng)見(jiàn)一個(gè)店員對(duì)顧客說(shuō):不,夫人,這會(huì)兒沒(méi)有,一時(shí)半會(huì)兒看來(lái)也不會(huì)有。

  Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we'll havesomesoon, we placed an order last week.

  經(jīng)理驚恐萬(wàn)分地跑到顧客跟前說(shuō):當(dāng)然,馬上就會(huì)有的。我們上周訂了貨。

  Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything saywe've got it on order and it's coming.Now what was it she wanted?

  然后經(jīng)理把店員拉到一邊:千萬(wàn),千萬(wàn),千萬(wàn)不要說(shuō)我們沒(méi)有什么,說(shuō)我們已經(jīng)訂了貨,貨馬上就到。現(xiàn)在你說(shuō)她要買(mǎi)什么?

  Rain, said the clerk.

  雨,店員說(shuō)。

  超級(jí)搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話:好孩子 Good Boy!

  Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

  小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢(qián)。

  "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

  “昨天給你的錢(qián)干什么了?”

  "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

  “我給了一個(gè)可憐的老太婆,”他回答說(shuō)。

  "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly.

  “你真是個(gè)好孩子,”媽媽驕傲地說(shuō)。

  "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

  “再給你兩分錢(qián)??赡銥槭裁磳?duì)那位老太太那么感興趣呢?”

  "She is the one who sells the candy."

  “她是個(gè)賣(mài)糖果的。”

  
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