關(guān)于英語(yǔ)冷笑話短文閱讀
關(guān)于英語(yǔ)冷笑話短文閱讀
笑話(анекдот)是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過(guò)笑話我們可以看到一個(gè)民族的生存環(huán)境、生活方式、社會(huì)關(guān)系和心理特征等等。本文是關(guān)于英語(yǔ)冷笑話短文，希望對(duì)大家有幫助!
關(guān)于英語(yǔ)冷笑話短文：聰明的鳥(niǎo)
When the burglar broke into a seemingly empty room one night, a voice suddenly shattered the silence ;"I see you,and the saint sees you. "
一位竊賊一天夜里闖進(jìn)一個(gè)好像沒(méi)有人的空房子。突然寂靜中傳來(lái)一聲:“我看見(jiàn)你了，圣人也看見(jiàn)你了。”
The shaken thief took another tentative step.“I see you，”the voice said again:“and the saint sees you.“With that，the burglar shined his flashlight in the direction that the voice was coming from. There，in the circle of light，sat a parrot.
這位驚恐不安的賊又試圖再走一步，那個(gè)聲音又說(shuō):“我看見(jiàn)你了，圣人也看見(jiàn)你了。”聽(tīng)到聲音，竊絨用手電照著聲音所傳來(lái)的方向。在那邊兒，一束燈光下坐著一只鸚鵡。
"Dumb bird,!'the burglar uttered in relief.
“該死的鳥(niǎo)，”竊賊像松了口氣似地罵著。
"I see you，”the parrot repeated,”and the saint sees you. "
“我看見(jiàn)你了。”鸚鵡重復(fù)地叨嘮著:“圣人也看見(jiàn)你了。”
"Shut up，“the man snarled as he turned on a lamp， that's when he saw the menacing Doberman Pinscher sitting beside the parrot's perch，staring at him with glittering eyes.
“閉嘴，”竊賊邊開(kāi)燈，邊喊叫著。這時(shí)他發(fā)現(xiàn)一條眼光咄咄逼人的構(gòu)坐在鸚鵡旁。
" Sic' em，Saint,"squawked the parrot.
鸚鵡尖叫著:“圣人，撲呀!撲呀!”
關(guān)于英語(yǔ)冷笑話短文：磕睡之人
The preacher was vexed because a certain member of his congregation always fell asleep during the sermon. As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon.
收師非常生氣，因?yàn)榭傆幸粋€(gè)人在他說(shuō)教時(shí)睡覺(jué)。一個(gè)星期天，正當(dāng)坐在前排的那個(gè)人打瞌睡時(shí)，牧師決定要好好地教育他不要睡覺(jué)。
In a whisper, he asked the congregation. "All who want to go to heaven, please rise，" Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering" Be seated"，the minister shouted at the top of his voice，"All those who want to be with the devil，please rise. "
他低聲地對(duì)教徒們說(shuō):“想去天堂的人都站起來(lái)。”除打瞌睡的人外，每個(gè)人都站了起來(lái)。牧師說(shuō)過(guò)請(qǐng)坐之后，高聲喊道:“下地獄的請(qǐng)站起來(lái)!”
Awaking with a start，the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpit,”Well，sir," he said.,"I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
打瞌睡的人被這突然的喊叫聲所驚醒，站了起來(lái)?？吹侥翈煾哒驹诮虊?，正生氣地望著他。他說(shuō):“先生，我不知我們?cè)谶x什么，但看上去你和我是唯一的侯選人。”
關(guān)于英語(yǔ)冷笑話短文：只剩一個(gè)引擎
A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker:"Attention，passengers. We have lost one of our engines，but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately， we will arrive an hour late as a result. "
一架747客機(jī)正跨越大西洋時(shí)，喇叭里傳來(lái)了機(jī)長(zhǎng)的聲音:“旅客們請(qǐng)注意，我們四個(gè)引擎之中有一個(gè)丟失了。但利下的三個(gè)引擎會(huì)把我們帶到倫敦的。不幸的是因此我們書晚到一小時(shí)。”
Shortly thereafter，the passengers heard the captain's voice again:"Guess what，folks. We just lost our third engine，but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late. "
過(guò)了一會(huì)兒，旅客們又聽(tīng)到了機(jī)長(zhǎng)的聲音:“各位，你們猜怎么啦?”我們剛又掉了第三個(gè)引擎。但請(qǐng)你們相信好了，有一個(gè)引擎我們也能飛，但要晚三個(gè)小時(shí)了。”
At this point，one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake,"he shouted，"If we lose another engine，we'll be up here all night !"
正在這時(shí)，一位乘客非常氣憤地說(shuō):“看在上帝的扮止，如果我們?cè)俚粢粋€(gè)引拿，我們會(huì)整夜都呆在天上了。”
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