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最搞笑的英文小笑話欣賞

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

  笑話使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松。在交際場(chǎng)合,能恰到好處地講個(gè)笑話或自創(chuàng)一個(gè)幽默,不僅可以體現(xiàn)自己的語(yǔ)言水平,還可以提升個(gè)人魅力。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享最搞笑的英文小笑話,希望可以幫助大家!

  最搞笑的英文小笑話:In The Air

  Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town.

  "Let's go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven't been anywhere for a long time."

  Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I'm not going to spend much money. We'll look at things, but we won't buy anything. "

  They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt's wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.

  Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.

  "Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.

  Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn't want to have to pay for his wife, as well.

  "I've only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn't selling many tickets, so he said, "I'll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn't scream or shout, she can have a free flight."

  Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.

  The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.

  When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn't make a sound. She can have her ride free."

  "Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn't easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."

  麥特和妻子住在鄉(xiāng)下。麥特很吝嗇,討厭花錢(qián)。一天附近的鎮(zhèn)子逢集。

  “我們?nèi)ペs集,麥特,”妻子說(shuō)。“我們很久沒(méi)出去了。”

  麥特想了一會(huì)兒。他知道在集市上一定得花錢(qián)。最后他說(shuō):“好吧,但我不打算花太多錢(qián)。我們只看不買。”

  他們?nèi)ゼ?,看看所有可買的東西。有很多東西麥特的妻子想買,但麥特不讓她買。

  然后在附近的露天場(chǎng)地,他們看到一架小飛機(jī)。

  “有趣的飛行。”海報(bào)上寫(xiě)著,“10分鐘10美元。”

  麥特從來(lái)沒(méi)有乘過(guò)飛機(jī),所以他想乘一次小飛機(jī)。然而他不想付他妻子的票錢(qián)。

  “我只帶了10美元,”他對(duì)飛機(jī)駕駛員說(shuō),“我妻子能免費(fèi)和我一起乘飛機(jī)嗎?”駕駛員沒(méi)賣出多少票,所以他說(shuō):“我和你做個(gè)交易。如果你妻子不尖叫,也不叫出聲來(lái),她就能免費(fèi)飛行。”

  麥特同意了,他和妻子一起登上了飛機(jī)。

  飛機(jī)起飛了,駕駛員讓飛機(jī)做出各種各樣的動(dòng)作。有一會(huì)兒飛機(jī)倒著飛行。

  飛機(jī)著陸時(shí),駕駛員說(shuō),“好吧,你妻子沒(méi)發(fā)出任何聲響。她就不用買飛機(jī)票了。”

  “謝謝,”麥特說(shuō),“你知道,這對(duì)她不容易,特別當(dāng)她剛才掉下去的時(shí)候。”

  最搞笑的英文小笑話:一廂情愿的誤會(huì)

  At the supermarket I noticed an elderly man who seemed to be following me wherever I went. As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he was interested in me. At the dairy counter I was checking out the eggs when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Turning around, I saw that it was the same man. "Lady," he finally said, "you have my shopping cart."

  在超市我注意到一位上了年紀(jì)的男子好像總在跟著我。我每到一個(gè)售貨通道,他就跟我到一個(gè)售貨通道,微笑地看著我。我開(kāi)始想他是不是喜歡上我了。在乳品柜,我正給雞蛋包裝結(jié)賬時(shí),有人在我肩上輕拍了一下。我轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)身發(fā)現(xiàn)還是那個(gè)男子。“女士,”他終于開(kāi)口說(shuō)話了,“你用著我的購(gòu)物車呢。”

  最搞笑的英文小笑話:Losing One Pound

  I complimented one of my co-workers on having lost ten pounds. However, I couldn't resistbragging that when I was 17, 1 weighed 225 pounds and today I tip the scales at 224. 1 added, "That's not bad for a man of my age."

  Overhearing this, a woman remarked, "You mean to say it took you all this time to lose onepound?"

  我稱贊我的一個(gè)同事減肥10磅。可是,我禁不住夸耀說(shuō)我17歲時(shí),體重225磅,而目前體重是224磅。我還說(shuō):“這對(duì)我這樣年齡的男子來(lái)說(shuō),是不錯(cuò)的。”

  一個(gè)女子聽(tīng)到了這些話,她說(shuō)道:“你是說(shuō)你花了這么長(zhǎng)時(shí)間才減了1磅?”

  
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