英語(yǔ)小笑話演講稿帶翻譯
英語(yǔ)小笑話演講稿帶翻譯
冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,它輕松詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕松的情趣,它一出現(xiàn)便受到了大多數(shù)人的喜愛(ài)。小編精心收集了英語(yǔ)小笑話演講稿帶翻譯，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
英語(yǔ)小笑話演講稿帶翻譯：伊甸園
Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked Adam, “What is wrong with you?"
亞當(dāng)在伊甸園里走來(lái)走去，感到十分的孤獨(dú)。上帝問(wèn)亞當(dāng):“你怎么了?”
Adam said, "I don’t have anyone to talk to.”
亞當(dāng)說(shuō):“我連個(gè)說(shuō)話的人都沒(méi)有。”
God said，"I will give you a companion and it will be a woman.” He said, "This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make, she will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.”
上帝說(shuō):“我會(huì)給你找個(gè)伴兒，她就是一個(gè)女人。”上帝接著說(shuō):“這個(gè)人會(huì)為你煮飯，洗衣服，她會(huì)時(shí)時(shí)刻刻同意你的意見(jiàn)，她還會(huì)為你生兒育女，而且從不會(huì)讓你在半夜里起床照顧孩子。她更不會(huì)嘮叨。她總是第一個(gè)承認(rèn)自己錯(cuò)了。當(dāng)你們有分歧的時(shí)候，她也不會(huì)頭痛，在你需要的時(shí)候，她仍舊會(huì)毫無(wú)保留地給你她全部的愛(ài)和熱情。”
"She will not nag,” God continued, "and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement, she will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever needed.”
亞當(dāng)問(wèn)上帝:“想得到這個(gè)女人，我要付出什么代價(jià)?”
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?" God said, "An arm and a Leg!”
上帝說(shuō):“一條胳膊和一條腿。”
Adam said, "What can I get for just a rib?"
亞當(dāng)說(shuō):“那一根肋骨能換什么?”
AND THE REST IS HISTORY.
于是就有了后來(lái)的人類(lèi)歷史。
英語(yǔ)小笑話演講稿帶翻譯：逛購(gòu)物中心
A boy and his father visiting from a third world country were at Lakeside Mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again.
一對(duì)來(lái)自第三世界國(guó)家的父子來(lái)到了湖岸購(gòu)物中心。他們被眼前的一切驚呆了，特別是兩面發(fā)光的銀墻，這墻不但可以分開(kāi)，還可以合上。
The boy asked his father, "What is this father?" The father responded, "Son I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is!”
兒子問(wèn)父親:“爸爸，這是什么?”爸爸回答說(shuō):“兒子，我這輩子還從來(lái)沒(méi)見(jiàn)過(guò)這東西呢，我也不知道這是什么。”
While the boy and his father were watching wide一eyed an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving wails and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction. The walls opened up again and a voluptuous 24 years old woman stepped out.
這對(duì)父子睜大了眼睛，他們看見(jiàn)一位坐輪椅的老太太，搖到那面會(huì)移動(dòng)的墻面前按了一下按鈕，墻打開(kāi)了，老太太搖著輪椅從兩面墻的中間穿了過(guò)去，進(jìn)了一個(gè)小屋子里。墻合上了。男孩和他的爸爸看到墻上閃動(dòng)著的寫(xiě)有數(shù)字的小圓燈在向上移動(dòng)。他們又看到那小圓燈又向相反的方向移動(dòng)。墻打開(kāi)了，從里面走出一位約24歲迷人的女人。
The father said to his son, "Go to get your mother".
爸爸對(duì)兒子說(shuō):“走，快去把你媽叫來(lái)。”
英語(yǔ)小笑話演講稿帶翻譯：用了一根棍子，就進(jìn)了監(jiān)獄
David St. John, 37，was the victim last week of what police say was a terrible mistake.
37歲的大衛(wèi)·斯特·約翰，上周成了警察犯的一個(gè)大錯(cuò)誤的犧牲品。
The two Hayward police officers used their batons to hit St. John, who they didn' t realize was blind，after mistaking his collapsible cane for an illegal martial arts weapon, said Lt. Mitchell Penn, the police department' s internal affairs officer.
警察署的內(nèi)務(wù)警官米切爾·潘說(shuō)，兩名看守警察用警棍打了約翰先生，因?yàn)樗麄儧](méi)有注意到約翰是一位盲人，錯(cuò)把他的折疊拐杖當(dāng)作了一種違法的兩節(jié)棍。
"It was a very regrettable incident,” Penn said Tuesday. "But from what I've seen so far it's not a case of overzealous officers. They had no idea he was blind-they were extremely upset when they found out.”
“這是一樁讓人非常抱歉的案子。”潘在星期二時(shí)說(shuō):“但從我們所分析的情況來(lái)看，這不是由于警員過(guò)于認(rèn)真造成的，而是他們確實(shí)不知道他是盲人—當(dāng)他們知道真實(shí)情況后，后悔末及。”
Field training officer Eric Ristram said St. John placed in his pants pocket what appeared to be a nunchaku, a martial arts weapon consisting of two round sticks of wood connect by a chain.
野外訓(xùn)練軍官伊瑞克·瑞斯姆說(shuō):“約翰褲兜里放著一個(gè)東西，看上去像是一根兩節(jié)棍，它是由兩個(gè)可旋轉(zhuǎn)的木棍組成的，中間被一條鏈連著。”
The officers thought the man could see their uniforms so they didn't identify themselves when they told St. John to hand over the contents of his pockets. St. John said later he thought he was about to be mugged.
警官在讓約翰交出兜里的東西時(shí)，以為約翰可以通過(guò)他制服來(lái)判斷他的身份，所以沒(méi)有出示證件，而約翰說(shuō)他還以為自己遭劫了呢。
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