英語小笑話演講稿帶翻譯
英語小笑話演講稿帶翻譯
冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語言現象,它輕松詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕松的情趣,它一出現便受到了大多數人的喜愛。小編精心收集了英語小笑話演講稿帶翻譯，供大家欣賞學習!
英語小笑話演講稿帶翻譯：伊甸園
Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked Adam, “What is wrong with you?"
亞當在伊甸園里走來走去，感到十分的孤獨。上帝問亞當:“你怎么了?”
Adam said, "I don’t have anyone to talk to.”
亞當說:“我連個說話的人都沒有。”
God said，"I will give you a companion and it will be a woman.” He said, "This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make, she will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.”
上帝說:“我會給你找個伴兒，她就是一個女人。”上帝接著說:“這個人會為你煮飯，洗衣服，她會時時刻刻同意你的意見，她還會為你生兒育女，而且從不會讓你在半夜里起床照顧孩子。她更不會嘮叨。她總是第一個承認自己錯了。當你們有分歧的時候，她也不會頭痛，在你需要的時候，她仍舊會毫無保留地給你她全部的愛和熱情。”
"She will not nag,” God continued, "and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement, she will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever needed.”
亞當問上帝:“想得到這個女人，我要付出什么代價?”
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?" God said, "An arm and a Leg!”
上帝說:“一條胳膊和一條腿。”
Adam said, "What can I get for just a rib?"
亞當說:“那一根肋骨能換什么?”
AND THE REST IS HISTORY.
于是就有了后來的人類歷史。
英語小笑話演講稿帶翻譯：逛購物中心
A boy and his father visiting from a third world country were at Lakeside Mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again.
一對來自第三世界國家的父子來到了湖岸購物中心。他們被眼前的一切驚呆了，特別是兩面發(fā)光的銀墻，這墻不但可以分開，還可以合上。
The boy asked his father, "What is this father?" The father responded, "Son I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is!”
兒子問父親:“爸爸，這是什么?”爸爸回答說:“兒子，我這輩子還從來沒見過這東西呢，我也不知道這是什么。”
While the boy and his father were watching wide一eyed an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving wails and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction. The walls opened up again and a voluptuous 24 years old woman stepped out.
這對父子睜大了眼睛，他們看見一位坐輪椅的老太太，搖到那面會移動的墻面前按了一下按鈕，墻打開了，老太太搖著輪椅從兩面墻的中間穿了過去，進了一個小屋子里。墻合上了。男孩和他的爸爸看到墻上閃動著的寫有數字的小圓燈在向上移動。他們又看到那小圓燈又向相反的方向移動。墻打開了，從里面走出一位約24歲迷人的女人。
The father said to his son, "Go to get your mother".
爸爸對兒子說:“走，快去把你媽叫來。”
英語小笑話演講稿帶翻譯：用了一根棍子，就進了監(jiān)獄
David St. John, 37，was the victim last week of what police say was a terrible mistake.
37歲的大衛(wèi)·斯特·約翰，上周成了警察犯的一個大錯誤的犧牲品。
The two Hayward police officers used their batons to hit St. John, who they didn' t realize was blind，after mistaking his collapsible cane for an illegal martial arts weapon, said Lt. Mitchell Penn, the police department' s internal affairs officer.
警察署的內務警官米切爾·潘說，兩名看守警察用警棍打了約翰先生，因為他們沒有注意到約翰是一位盲人，錯把他的折疊拐杖當作了一種違法的兩節(jié)棍。
"It was a very regrettable incident,” Penn said Tuesday. "But from what I've seen so far it's not a case of overzealous officers. They had no idea he was blind-they were extremely upset when they found out.”
“這是一樁讓人非常抱歉的案子。”潘在星期二時說:“但從我們所分析的情況來看，這不是由于警員過于認真造成的，而是他們確實不知道他是盲人—當他們知道真實情況后，后悔末及。”
Field training officer Eric Ristram said St. John placed in his pants pocket what appeared to be a nunchaku, a martial arts weapon consisting of two round sticks of wood connect by a chain.
野外訓練軍官伊瑞克·瑞斯姆說:“約翰褲兜里放著一個東西，看上去像是一根兩節(jié)棍，它是由兩個可旋轉的木棍組成的，中間被一條鏈連著。”
The officers thought the man could see their uniforms so they didn't identify themselves when they told St. John to hand over the contents of his pockets. St. John said later he thought he was about to be mugged.
警官在讓約翰交出兜里的東西時，以為約翰可以通過他制服來判斷他的身份，所以沒有出示證件，而約翰說他還以為自己遭劫了呢。
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