英語(yǔ)笑話是指以一句英文短語(yǔ)或一個(gè)英文故事讓說(shuō)話者和聽(tīng)者之間覺(jué)得好笑,或是產(chǎn)生幽默感,笑話是一種經(jīng)過(guò)藝術(shù)加工的語(yǔ)言形式,是藝術(shù)化的語(yǔ)言,笑話是一種藝術(shù)方法。下面小編給大家推薦幾篇英語(yǔ)長(zhǎng)篇笑話帶翻譯，希望大家喜歡。

　　長(zhǎng)篇英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯一：

　　Don't You Like Any of Our Colours Today?

　　Mrs. Green was eighty，but she had a small car，and she always drove to the shops in it on Saturday and bought her food.

　　She did not drive fast，because she was old，but she drove well and never hit anything. Sometimes her grandchildren said to her，“Please don't drive your car，grandmother. We can take you to the shops.”

　　But she always said，“No，I like driving. I've driven for fifty years，and I'm not going to stop now.”

　　Last Saturday she stopped her car at some traffic-lights because they were red，and then it did not start again. The lights were green，then yellow，then red，

　　then green again，but her car did not start.

　　“What am I going to do now?” She said.

　　But then a policeman came and said to her kindly，“Good morning. Don't you like any of our colours today?”

　　格林太太八十歲了。她有一輛小型轎車，每逢星期六她總是開(kāi)著這輛車去購(gòu)買食品。

　　因?yàn)槟昙o(jì)大了，格林太太車子開(kāi)得不快，不過(guò)她開(kāi)車技術(shù)很高，從來(lái)沒(méi)有出過(guò)事。有時(shí)她的孫子孫女們對(duì)她說(shuō)：“奶奶，您別開(kāi)車了，我們可以送您去商店。”

　　但她總是說(shuō)：“不，我喜歡開(kāi)車。我已經(jīng)開(kāi)了五十年了，現(xiàn)在還不想撒手。”

　　上星期六，她看見(jiàn)交通燈是紅色就剎住了車。后來(lái)車子熄火了。交通燈由綠色轉(zhuǎn)為黃色，然后轉(zhuǎn)為紅色，又轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)榫G色，可她的車子還是發(fā)動(dòng)不起來(lái)。

　　“現(xiàn)在我該怎么辦呢?”她說(shuō)。

　　這時(shí)一位警察走過(guò)來(lái)，和氣地對(duì)她說(shuō)：“早上好，今天交通燈的顏色沒(méi)有一樣您喜歡嗎?”

　　長(zhǎng)篇英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯二：

　　Who is Stupid

　　A teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!"

　　Little Johnny then stood up.

　　The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Johnny?"

　　"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"

　　誰(shuí)愚蠢

　　一個(gè)老師在對(duì)學(xué)生們講心理學(xué)，“誰(shuí)認(rèn)為自己蠢就站起來(lái)?”她一開(kāi)始就說(shuō)。

　　小約翰尼站了起來(lái)。

　　“你認(rèn)為你很蠢嗎，小約翰尼?”老師問(wèn)。

　　“不是的，老師，我只是不喜歡看你一個(gè)人站著。”

　　長(zhǎng)篇英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯三：

　　Good intentions

　　One day a boy came to his teacher and said:"Teacher，my dad wants to know if you like roast pig.”

　　"I certainly do，”said the teacher, "And you tell your father he is very kind to think of me.”

　　Days passed，and nothing more was said about the roast pig.

　　Finally the teacher said to the boy，“I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig.”

　　"Yes，"said the boy，“He did intend to，but the pig got well.”

　　良好的心愿

　　一天有個(gè)男孩去對(duì)他老師說(shuō):“老師，我爸想知道你是不是愛(ài)吃烤豬肉。”

　　“當(dāng)然口，”老師說(shuō)，“去告訴你父親，多謝他想著我。”

　　好幾天過(guò)去了，男孩再?zèng)]提起烤豬肉的事兒。

　　最后老師對(duì)男孩說(shuō):“我以為你父親要給我送點(diǎn)烤豬肉來(lái)呢。”

　　“是啊，”孩子說(shuō)，“他是這么想的，可后來(lái)豬病好了。”