長(zhǎng)篇英語笑話3篇帶翻譯笑死人的

　　英語笑話是指以一句英文短語或一個(gè)英文故事讓說話者和聽者之間覺得好笑,或是產(chǎn)生幽默感,笑話是一種經(jīng)過藝術(shù)加工的語言形式,是藝術(shù)化的語言,笑話是一種藝術(shù)方法。下面小編給大家推薦三篇英語長(zhǎng)篇笑話帶翻譯，希望大家喜歡。

　　長(zhǎng)篇英語笑話帶翻譯一：

　　A gentleman was sitting quietly in a first-class compartment. Two ladies got in. One of them saw that the window was open and she shut it before sitting down."Open it again," said the second lady, "I'll die of suffocation(窒息，悶死) if there is no fresh air.""I won't open it," said the first lady, "I'll die of cold if the window is open."A querrel started, and it continued until the gentleman spoke:"Let's have the window shut until this lady has died of suffocation, and then we can have it open until this lady has died of cold. After that it will be nice and quiet in here again."

　　解決問題的好辦法 一位紳士正靜靜地坐在頭等包廂里，有兩位女士走了進(jìn)來。其中一位見窗戶開著，就在落坐之前把窗戶“把窗戶打開，”第二位女士說道，“如果沒有新鮮空氣，我會(huì)被憋死的。” “不能打開，”第一位說道，“如果它開著，我會(huì)被凍死的。” 一場(chǎng)爭(zhēng)吵開始，沒完沒了，直到那位紳士開口： “我們先讓窗戶關(guān)著，直到把這位女士憋死，然后再打開窗戶，直到把這位女士?jī)鏊馈Ｄ且院?，這兒就可以恢復(fù)平靜了。”

　　長(zhǎng)篇英語笑話帶翻譯二：

　　One real man

　　The ruler of an ancient kingdom wanted to disprove the statement that the men of his domain were ruled by their wives. He had all the males in his kingdom brought before him and warned that any man who did not tell the truth would be punished severely(嚴(yán)格地，嚴(yán)厲地).

　　Then he asked all the men who obeyed their wives' directions and counsel(勸告，建議) to step to the left side of the hall. All the men did so but one little man who moved to the right.

　　It's good to see, said the king, that we have one real man in the kingdom. Tell thesechickenhearted(膽小的) dunces(傻瓜) why you alone among them stand on the right side of the hall.

　　Your Majesty, came the reply in a squealing voice, it is because before I left home my wife told me to keep out of crowds.

　　一個(gè)真正的男子漢

　　古代有一個(gè)國(guó)王，他想證明他領(lǐng)土內(nèi)的男人并非像人們傳說的那樣，受到老婆的管制。他把王國(guó)里所有的男人都召到跟前，警告說，哪個(gè)男人膽敢不說實(shí)話，就會(huì)受到嚴(yán)厲的懲罰。

　　然后，他叫所有聽從妻子的命令和意見的男人都走向大廳的左側(cè)。所有的男人都站到了左側(cè)，只有一個(gè)小個(gè)子男人站到了右側(cè)。

　　國(guó)王說：看到我們國(guó)家里還有一個(gè)真正的男子漢，真是令人高興。告訴這些膽小的笨蛋，為什么在他們當(dāng)中只有你一個(gè)人站在大廳的右側(cè)。

　　陛下，那人尖聲地回答：因?yàn)樵谖页鲩T之前，我老婆告訴我不要扎堆。

　　長(zhǎng)篇英語笑話帶翻譯三：

　　A preacher is buying a parrotAre you sure it doesnt scream, yell, or swear? asked the preacher.Oh absolutely. Its a religious parrot, the storekeeper assures him.Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lords prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm.Wonderful! says the preacher, but what happens if you pull both strings?I fall off my perch, you stupid fool! screeched the parrot.

　　一個(gè)傳教士在買鸚鵡

　　“你確信它不會(huì)尖叫，大叫或詛咒別人嗎?”傳教士問。“哦，絕對(duì)不會(huì)。它是一只虔誠(chéng)的鸚鵡。”店主保證說。“你看見它腿上的這些細(xì)繩了嗎?當(dāng)你拉動(dòng)右面的這根，它會(huì)背誦天主經(jīng)，當(dāng)你拉動(dòng)左面的那根，它會(huì)背誦贊美詩”“太棒了!”傳教士說，“但是如果我同時(shí)拉動(dòng)兩條繩子，會(huì)發(fā)生什么呢?”“我會(huì)從樹干上掉下去的，你這個(gè)笨蛋!”鸚鵡尖聲說道。