關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑
關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑
民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛(ài)的民間敘事類(lèi)型,材料豐富,有廣泛的現(xiàn)實(shí)基礎(chǔ)。小編精心收集了關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇1
Liar,Liar
騙子,騙子
A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.
老婆與隔壁鄰居到警察局報(bào)案 說(shuō)她的老公失蹤了。
The policeman asked her for a description.
警察要求,她形容一下。
She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."
她說(shuō):“他三十五歲,六尺四寸,黑眼睛,波浪狀的深色頭發(fā);體格健壯,體重185磅,說(shuō)話很輕,而且對(duì)小孩子很好。”
The next-door neighbor protested,
隔壁鄰居期提出反駁說(shuō):
"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."
“你老公五尺四寸,胖嘟嘟 的,禿頭,有一個(gè)太嘴巴,而且對(duì)你的小孩很刻薄。”
The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"
老婆回答說(shuō):“你說(shuō)對(duì)了,可是誰(shuí)會(huì)要 這種沒(méi)用的廢物 回來(lái)呀?”
關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇2
黑人英語(yǔ)
The black couple already had eight children, and Lula May was pregnantwith her ninth. Finally she convinced her husband to get a vasectomy.
一對(duì)黑人夫婦已有八個(gè)小孩,而魯拉·梅又懷了第九個(gè)小孩,最后她說(shuō)服了她先生去做男性絕育手術(shù)。
On the morning of the operation, she was surprised to see her husbandputting on a tuxedo and getting into a limousine for the short ride to thehospital.
手術(shù)的早晨,她驚訝地看見(jiàn)她老公穿著禮服,乘坐一輛禮車(chē)到不遠(yuǎn)的醫(yī)院去。
"Say, honey, what's all this about?" asked Lula May.
"親愛(ài)的,這是怎么一回事啊?魯拉·梅問(wèn)道。"
"Baby, if you gonna be important, you gotta look important.
"寶貝,如果你想當(dāng)名大人物的話,就要讓人一看就知道你很重要!"
關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇3
財(cái)政學(xué)的一課
Smith was the manager of a construction company and was taking bids on a new project. Thefirst bidder was a Polish company, and their representative offered to do the job for $ 400,000. "That seems reasonable," said Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown on that?"
史密斯是一家建設(shè)公司的經(jīng)理,他正負(fù)責(zé)一個(gè)新工程的招標(biāo)案。第一位投標(biāo)的是一家波蘭公司,他們的代表出價(jià)四十萬(wàn)元接那個(gè)案子。“似乎很合理,”史密斯說(shuō)。“你可不可以給我一張明細(xì)表呢?”
"Sure," said the Pole, " 0, 000 for labor and $ 200,000 for materials. "
“當(dāng)然沒(méi)問(wèn)題,”波蘭公司代表說(shuō)道,“二十萬(wàn)元工資,二十萬(wàn)元材科費(fèi)。”
Next to make a bid was the Standard American Construction Company, which bid $ 800,000.
下一個(gè)出標(biāo)的是美國(guó)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)建設(shè)公司,他們以八十萬(wàn)元競(jìng)標(biāo)。
"Hmm, that seems a bit high," said Smith. "What's the breakdown?"
“嗯,這個(gè)價(jià)錢(qián)似乎有些偏高,”史密斯說(shuō)道。"你們有明細(xì)表嗎?"
" $ 400,000 0n materials, $ 400,000 0n labor. "
“四十萬(wàn)元材料,四十萬(wàn)元工資。”
"I'll get back to you. "
“我以后再同你聯(lián)系。”
Finally the representative of Cohen, Goldstein and Leibowitz entered Smith's office. " $ 1,200,000 is our bid," said the agent."
最后可翰•高斯坦•雷伯威茲公司的代表走進(jìn)史密斯辦公室。“一百二十萬(wàn)元是我們競(jìng)標(biāo)的價(jià)碼,”代表說(shuō)道。
200, 0001 That' s way out of line," exclaimed Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown onthat?"
“一百二十萬(wàn)元這個(gè)標(biāo)高得太過(guò)分了,”史密斯叫道“你可以給我一張明細(xì)表嗎?"
"No problem," replied the rep. " 0, 000 for me,$ 400 , 000 for you and $ 400,000 for thePolacks.
“沒(méi)有問(wèn)題,”代表回答道。“四十萬(wàn)元給我,四十萬(wàn)元給你,最后四十萬(wàn)元?jiǎng)t給那家波蘭佬開(kāi)的公司。”
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