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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話 > 關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑

關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑

  民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛(ài)的民間敘事類(lèi)型,材料豐富,有廣泛的現(xiàn)實(shí)基礎(chǔ)。小編精心收集了關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

  關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇1

  Liar,Liar

  騙子,騙子

  A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.

  老婆與隔壁鄰居到警察局報(bào)案 說(shuō)她的老公失蹤了。

  The policeman asked her for a description.

  警察要求,她形容一下。

  She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."

  她說(shuō):“他三十五歲,六尺四寸,黑眼睛,波浪狀的深色頭發(fā);體格健壯,體重185磅,說(shuō)話很輕,而且對(duì)小孩子很好。”

  The next-door neighbor protested,

  隔壁鄰居期提出反駁說(shuō):

  "Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."

  “你老公五尺四寸,胖嘟嘟 的,禿頭,有一個(gè)太嘴巴,而且對(duì)你的小孩很刻薄。”

  The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"

  老婆回答說(shuō):“你說(shuō)對(duì)了,可是誰(shuí)會(huì)要 這種沒(méi)用的廢物 回來(lái)呀?”

  關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇2

  黑人英語(yǔ)

  The black couple already had eight children, and Lula May was pregnantwith her ninth. Finally she convinced her husband to get a vasectomy.

  一對(duì)黑人夫婦已有八個(gè)小孩,而魯拉·梅又懷了第九個(gè)小孩,最后她說(shuō)服了她先生去做男性絕育手術(shù)。

  On the morning of the operation, she was surprised to see her husbandputting on a tuxedo and getting into a limousine for the short ride to thehospital.

  手術(shù)的早晨,她驚訝地看見(jiàn)她老公穿著禮服,乘坐一輛禮車(chē)到不遠(yuǎn)的醫(yī)院去。

  "Say, honey, what's all this about?" asked Lula May.

  "親愛(ài)的,這是怎么一回事啊?魯拉·梅問(wèn)道。"

  "Baby, if you gonna be important, you gotta look important.

  "寶貝,如果你想當(dāng)名大人物的話,就要讓人一看就知道你很重要!"

  關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇3

  財(cái)政學(xué)的一課

  Smith was the manager of a construction company and was taking bids on a new project. Thefirst bidder was a Polish company, and their representative offered to do the job for $ 400,000. "That seems reasonable," said Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown on that?"

  史密斯是一家建設(shè)公司的經(jīng)理,他正負(fù)責(zé)一個(gè)新工程的招標(biāo)案。第一位投標(biāo)的是一家波蘭公司,他們的代表出價(jià)四十萬(wàn)元接那個(gè)案子。“似乎很合理,”史密斯說(shuō)。“你可不可以給我一張明細(xì)表呢?”

  "Sure," said the Pole, " 0, 000 for labor and $ 200,000 for materials. "

  “當(dāng)然沒(méi)問(wèn)題,”波蘭公司代表說(shuō)道,“二十萬(wàn)元工資,二十萬(wàn)元材科費(fèi)。”

  Next to make a bid was the Standard American Construction Company, which bid $ 800,000.

  下一個(gè)出標(biāo)的是美國(guó)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)建設(shè)公司,他們以八十萬(wàn)元競(jìng)標(biāo)。

  "Hmm, that seems a bit high," said Smith. "What's the breakdown?"

  “嗯,這個(gè)價(jià)錢(qián)似乎有些偏高,”史密斯說(shuō)道。"你們有明細(xì)表嗎?"

  " $ 400,000 0n materials, $ 400,000 0n labor. "

  “四十萬(wàn)元材料,四十萬(wàn)元工資。”

  "I'll get back to you. "

  “我以后再同你聯(lián)系。”

  Finally the representative of Cohen, Goldstein and Leibowitz entered Smith's office. " $ 1,200,000 is our bid," said the agent."

  最后可翰•高斯坦•雷伯威茲公司的代表走進(jìn)史密斯辦公室。“一百二十萬(wàn)元是我們競(jìng)標(biāo)的價(jià)碼,”代表說(shuō)道。

   200, 0001 That' s way out of line," exclaimed Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown onthat?"

  “一百二十萬(wàn)元這個(gè)標(biāo)高得太過(guò)分了,”史密斯叫道“你可以給我一張明細(xì)表嗎?"

  "No problem," replied the rep. " 0, 000 for me,$ 400 , 000 for you and $ 400,000 for thePolacks.

  “沒(méi)有問(wèn)題,”代表回答道。“四十萬(wàn)元給我,四十萬(wàn)元給你,最后四十萬(wàn)元?jiǎng)t給那家波蘭佬開(kāi)的公司。”

  
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