英語(yǔ)小笑話大全
笑話是日常生活中人們消遣娛樂(lè)的一種常見(jiàn)語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,其目的在于在會(huì)話過(guò)程中傳遞和激發(fā)幽默感。小編精心收集了爆笑英文笑話短文，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
爆笑英文笑話短文篇1
I didn't take that in
我沒(méi)有把藥吃下去
A fellow who was rather slow on the uptake had been suffering from constipation, so the doctor provided him with some suppositories.
有位理解能力相當(dāng)遲緩的老兄一直為便秘所苦，因此醫(yī)生給他一些利腸的栓劑。
A week later, the patient came back to tell the doctor that his condition had not improved.
一星期后病人回來(lái)告訴醫(yī)生，他的狀況尚未改進(jìn)。
"I'm amazed," said the doctor. " Have you been taking the medicine I prescribed for you?"
“我覺(jué)得好奇怪，”醫(yī)生說(shuō)。“你有沒(méi)有采用我開(kāi)給你的藥方呢?”
"What do you think I've been doing, shoving it up my ass?"
“你以為我做什么呢?難道要我把它們都塞進(jìn)屁股里嗎?”
爆笑英文笑話短文篇2
You said what?
你說(shuō)什么?
Moe, Larry and Curly had been stranded on a desert island. They were walking alongdisconsolately when Moe happened to kick a bottle lying in the sand. The bottle broke and agenie suddenly emerged before them.
莫伊、賴(lài)?yán)途砻虼|礁擱淺而被困在一個(gè)無(wú)人荒島上，他們寂寞無(wú)助地沿岸邊走著，這時(shí)莫伊踢到沙灘上一只瓶子，那只瓶子破了后，突然出現(xiàn)一個(gè)精靈。
"Thank you. oh Masters, for releasing me from my captivity. For your kindness, please allow meto grant you each a wish. "
“謝謝你們從囚禁我的瓶子中把我放出來(lái)，我的主人。為了報(bào)答你們的恩惠，請(qǐng)讓我為每位實(shí)現(xiàn)一個(gè)愿望。”
"Well, it's not too difficult to figure out what I want," said Moe. "I wish I were back home. "
“哦，我的愿望很容易想出來(lái)，”莫伊說(shuō)。“我希望我能回到家里。”
No sooner had he said the words than he was back in dear old Brooklyn.
話一說(shuō)完，莫伊就已在他可愛(ài)的布魯克林老家中。
"I want to be back home, too," said I Larry, and he, too, was instantly transported.
“我也想回家，”賴(lài)?yán)f(shuō)，他馬上也就被送走了。
" Gee, it's alone some here without Moe and Larry," said Curly. "I wish they were here to keepme company. "
“唉，沒(méi)有莫伊和賴(lài)?yán)?，一個(gè)人在這里真無(wú)聊，”卷毛說(shuō)。“我希望他們能回到這里陪伴我。”
爆笑英文笑話短文篇3
Oh，good job
哦，你做的真好
Moe, Larry, and Curly were wandering in the Arabian desert when they were captured by a bandof ferocious Bedouin.
莫伊。賴(lài)?yán)途砻齻€(gè)傻瓜走在阿拉伯沙漠中時(shí)，一群殘暴的貝都因人把他們抓了起來(lái)。
"By the code of the desert you miserable infidels must be destroyed," declared their savageleader. "Set up the guillotine !"
“依據(jù)我們沙漠的規(guī)定，你們這些可憐的異教徒必須被處死，”野蠻的首領(lǐng)說(shuō)道。“把斷頭臺(tái)架設(shè)好。”
Moe was the first to be ordered to the death instrument.
莫伊首先被命令上斷頭臺(tái)。
The blade descended but, amazingly, stopped just short of his neck.
但令人驚訝的是，刀具落下時(shí)在接近脖子地方就停止不動(dòng)了。
"It's a miracle! " declared the Arab. "Release him!"
“這是個(gè)奇跡!”這位阿拉伯人說(shuō)道。“把他放走!”
Next, Larry placed his head under the huge, razor-sharp blade. But once again it stoppedshort of his neck.
接著賴(lài)?yán)杨^放在像剃刀刀片一樣銳利的大刀之下，但又一次刀子在接近他的頸部地方停了下來(lái)。
"By Allah, another miracle!" affirmed the sheik once more. "Release him! "
“奉阿拉真主之命，又是另一個(gè)奇跡!”酋長(zhǎng)又一次宣布。“放了他!”
Finally, Curly was led to the ominous device. Looking closely he noticed a splinter of woodblocking the path of the blade.
最后卷毛被帶到那不吉利的斷頭臺(tái)上，仔細(xì)察看后，他發(fā)現(xiàn)一塊小木片擋住了刀鋒的去路。
"Well, no wonder it's not working," he announced.
“難怪它沒(méi)反應(yīng)，”他大聲說(shuō)道。
"Here's your problem right here."
“你們的問(wèn)題就在這里”
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