英語口語小笑話

　　下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的英語口語小笑話，希望對(duì)大家有幫助。

　　英語口語小笑話之圣誕心愿

　　有個(gè)叫亞歷山大的小男孩寫信給圣誕老人:

　　“親愛的圣誕老人，去年我收到的是一個(gè)妹妹，而不是一輛賽車。也許，另一個(gè)想得到妹妹的男童卻收到了賽車。我們把那個(gè)妹妹留了下來，但現(xiàn)在我仍然想要一輛賽車。”

　　鄰居的小男孩見亞歷山大這樣寫，也趕緊給寫了一封信:

　　“親愛的圣誕老人，去年您雖然幫我弄到了一輛賽車，但今年我還需要一輛大一歲的新賽車。至于那個(gè)新的小妹妹，您還是留到明年送給亞歷山大吧。”

　　英語口語小笑話：Christmas wish

　　Has to be called Alexander the young boy to write a letter forSanta Claus:

　　"Dear Santa Claus, last year I received am a younger sister, but wasnot a vehicle race. Perhaps, another wanted to obtain the youngersister the boy actually to receive the vehicle race. We have kept thatyounger sister 焉 are, but now I still wanted a vehicle race."

　　The neighbor young boy sees Alexander to write like this, also hurriedto give has written a letter:

　　"Dear Santa Claus, last year you although helped me to make a vehiclerace, but this year I also need a big year-old new vehicle race. Asfor that new little younger sister, you or will remain to the nextyear give Alexander."

　　英語口語小笑話之圣誕樹

　　查理每年都向他老爸吵著要圣誕樹，他老爸總是說太貴了，不想買。

　　今年圣誕節(jié)又到了，查理的老爸實(shí)在被他吵得頭疼，于是提起斧子出了門。過了一刻鐘，老爸扛著一棵大個(gè)的圣誕樹回來了。查理高興地大叫起來，“老爸，你真了不起，才花一刻鐘就砍了這么大的一棵樹回來!”

　　老爸拍拍他的后腦勺說，“傻小子，砍樹哪有那么快，我是從集市上帶回來的。”

　　查理問:“你不是嫌貴不想買的嗎?”

　　老爸說:“沒看我?guī)Я烁訂?”

　　英語口語小笑話：Christmas tree

　　Charlie quarrels every year to his old father is wanting theChristmas tree, his old father always said, has too expensively notwanted to buy.

　　This year Christmas day arrived, Charlie's old father really quarrelsby him the headache, thereupon mentioned the axe to leave the gate.Crossed the quarter of an hour, the old father carried on the shouldera big Christmas tree to come back. Charlie happily loudly cries out,"the old father, you are really great, only then spend the quarter ofan hour to chop a such big tree to come back!"

　　英語口語小笑話：the formula for water

　　An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: "Anyone knows the formula for water?""Sure. That's easy," said one man."What is it?""H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.""What, what?" reasked the instructor."H to O," explained the chemistry expert.

　　生化戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)課的老師在課堂上問士兵們：“誰知道水的分子式?”“當(dāng)然，太簡(jiǎn)單了。”一個(gè)士兵回答道。“是什么?”“H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.”“什么，什么?”老師又問道。“H to O，”化學(xué)專家解釋道。

　　英語口語小笑話：frog 青蛙

　　Frog The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."

　　老師正在給學(xué)生上生物課：“現(xiàn)在，我將要給你們看我袋子里的這只青蛙。”接著，他把手伸進(jìn)口袋，卻拿出了一份雞肉三文治。老師滿臉困惑地看了一眼，沉思了一會(huì)兒，說道：“真奇怪。我明明記得我已經(jīng)把午飯吃掉了。”

　　英語口語小笑話：相親 Blind Date

　　After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died.""Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

　　和盲約對(duì)象呆了一晚上后，男人再也受不了了。他事先安排了個(gè)朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開了。當(dāng)他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說：“有個(gè)不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛?cè)ナ懒恕?rdquo;“謝天謝地!”他的約會(huì)對(duì)象說，“如果你的祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了!”

　　英語口語小笑話：Lawyer and Engineer

　　A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down, and the insurance company paid for everything."

　　"That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my house were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."

　　The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?" he asked.

　　一個(gè)律師與一個(gè)工程師在加勒比海邊釣魚。律師說：“我到這里是因?yàn)槲业姆孔颖淮蠡馃?，保險(xiǎn)公司賠償了我所有的損失。”

　　“這太巧了，”工程師說，“我是因?yàn)榉孔颖缓樗疀_垮了，保險(xiǎn)公司也賠償了所有的損失。”

　　律師看起來有些困惑，“你是怎么引起洪水的?”他不解的問。

　　英語口語小笑話：Lose One Pound減掉一磅

　　I complimented one of my co-workers on having lost ten pounds. However, I couldn't resist bragging that when I was 17, 1 weighed 225 pounds and today I tip the scales at 224. 1 added, "That's not bad for a man of my age."

　　Overhearing this, a woman remarked, "You mean to say it took you all this time to lose one pound?"

　　我稱贊我的一個(gè)同事減肥10磅?？墒?，我禁不住夸耀說我17歲時(shí)，體重225磅，而目前體重是224磅。我還說：“這對(duì)我這樣年齡的男子來說，是不錯(cuò)的。”

　　一個(gè)女子聽到了這些話，她說道：“你是說你花了這么長(zhǎng)時(shí)間才減了1磅?”