經(jīng)典外國(guó)幽默故事四則

　　笑話是一種增強(qiáng)快樂的文化，常常以篇幅短小，故事情節(jié)簡(jiǎn)單，文筆巧妙的形式出現(xiàn)，給人以出乎意料，并且取得笑意的藝術(shù)效果的文化。在忙碌的生活，我們也需要偶爾的放松一下自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)硗鈬?guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：寄給上帝的信

　　一個(gè)小男孩非常想要一百美元買一輛自行車，但是祈禱了兩個(gè)星期也沒有結(jié)果。于是，他決定給上帝寫一封信要這一百美元。當(dāng)郵局收到這封收信人為“美國(guó)，上帝”的信后，他們決定把它寄給美國(guó)總統(tǒng)?？偨y(tǒng)很重視，也很感動(dòng)。他命令他的秘書寄給個(gè)小男孩五美元紙鈔。總統(tǒng)認(rèn)為這對(duì)于一個(gè)小男孩來說應(yīng)該是一筆大錢了。這個(gè)小男孩收到這五美元后非常高興，又坐下來給上帝寫了一封感謝信，信中寫道:

　　A little boy wanted one hundred dollar for a bicycle very badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the money. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, USA，they decided to send it to the president. The President was so impressed，touched and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a five bill. The President thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted wish the five-dollar bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord, which read:

　　親愛的上帝:

　　Dear Lord，

　　非常感謝你寄給我的錢。可是我發(fā)現(xiàn)，由于某種原因您通過華盛頓寄給我的錢，像往常一樣，那些奇怪的人扣走了九十五美元。

　　Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, DC and as usual, those jerks deducted ninety-five dollars.

　　羅杰

　　Love,Roger

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：法官的手表

　　A judge was instructing the jury that a witness was not necessarily to be regarded as untruthful because he changed his statement after he gave it to the police."For example," he said, "when I entered my chambers today，I was positive that I had my gold watch in my pocket. But then I remembered that I left it on my desk in my bedroom."

　　一個(gè)法官正告知陪審團(tuán)，不必因?yàn)橐粋€(gè)證人改變了他已經(jīng)交給警察的證詞就認(rèn)為他不可信。“比方說，”他說，“當(dāng)今天我走進(jìn)我的辦公室的時(shí)候，我以為我的金表

　　在我的口袋里。但隨后我想起來我把它放在我臥室的書桌上了。”

　　When the judge returned home that evening, his wife asked him，"Why so much urgency for your watch? Isn’t sending three men to pick it up for you a bit extreme?"

　　當(dāng)法官那天晚上回到家時(shí)，他妻子問他:“為什么那么著急要你的表?還派三個(gè)人取你的表，是不是有一點(diǎn)過分了?”

　　"What?” said the judge, "I didn't send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?"

　　“什么?”法官說，“我沒派人來取表，更不用說三個(gè)人。你都干了什么?”

　　"I gave it to the first man,” said the wife, "he knew exactly where it was."

　　“我把手表給了第一個(gè)人，”妻子說，“因?yàn)樗芮宄潜矸旁谑裁吹胤健?rdquo;

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：等警察來

　　Sam and a priest are driving one day and by a freak accident，have a head-on collision with tremendous force. Both cars are totally demolished，but amazingly，neither Sam nor the cleric has a scratch on.

　　一天，山姆和一個(gè)神父都在開車，發(fā)生了一起反常的事故，他們倆的車頭對(duì)頭猛撞到一起。兩輛車全毀了，但是意外的是倆個(gè)人都毫發(fā)未傷。

　　After the crawl out of their cars，Sam sees the priest’s collar and says，"So you’re a priest. I am Sam. Just look at our cars. There is nothing left, yet we are here unhurt. This must be a sign from God!”

　　他們從各自的車?yán)锱莱鰜砗?，山姆看到神父的領(lǐng)子說:“原來你是神父，我叫山姆?？纯次覀兊能?，全完了。然而我們還在這里，沒有受傷。這一定是上帝的旨意!”

　　Sam is looking at his car and exclaims, "And look at this! Here’s another miracle! My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of wine did not break. Surely，God wants us to drink this wine and to celebrate our good fortune.”

　　山姆看著他的車說:“快來看看這兒，還有一個(gè)奇跡!我的車全毀了，但這瓶酒還沒有碎。上帝肯定是想讓我們喝掉它來慶祝我們的好運(yùn)。

　　The priest nods in agreement. Sam hands the bottle to the priest，who drinks half of the bottle and hands the bottle back to Sam. Sam takes the bottle and immediate1y puts the cap on，then hands it back to the priest. The priest，baffled, asks，"Aren’t you having any，Sam?” Sam replies, "Nah...I think I'll wait for the police.”

　　神父點(diǎn)頭同意了。山姆把酒交給神父，神父喝了一半然后又把酒還給山姆。他接過酒瓶迅速把瓶蓋蓋上，又把它給了神父。神父不解地問:“難道你不喝嗎?山姆?”山姆回答:“嗯，我想我還是等著警察來吧。”

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：新手上班

　　A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small-crowed standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said，"Let' s get off the corner people.” A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off that corner…NOW!” Intimidated, the group of people began to leave，casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first officer act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" "Pretty good,” chuckled the vet, "especially since this is a bus stop.

　　一位新警官和一位有經(jīng)驗(yàn)的搭檔坐在警車?yán)锏谝淮稳パ策墶Ｒ粋€(gè)電話打來說讓他們?nèi)ヲ?qū)散一些閑逛的人。兩個(gè)警官把警車開到那條街上，他們看見有一群人正站在街的拐角上。新警官搖下車窗喊道:“拐角上的人群快點(diǎn)散開。”人們看了幾眼，但是沒有人動(dòng)。所以他又一次大喊:“那個(gè)拐角上的人們快點(diǎn)散開……馬上!”人們由于害怕開始離開那里，并向他投來了不解的目光。年輕的警察很為自己的第一次執(zhí)法行動(dòng)而驕傲，轉(zhuǎn)頭向他的搭檔說:“看，我干得怎么樣?”“非常好，”老警察笑著說，“只不過這里是一個(gè)公共汽車站。”