輕松幽默笑話
笑話是一種增強快樂的文化,常常以篇幅短小,故事情節(jié)簡單,文筆巧妙的形式出現(xiàn),給人以出乎意料,并且取得笑意的藝術(shù)效果的文化。在忙碌的生活,我們也需要偶爾的放松一下自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)磔p松幽默笑話,希望大家喜歡!
輕松幽默笑話:幸運的顧客
All the housewives who went to the new supermarket had one great ambition: to be the lucky customer who did not have to pay for her shopping. For this was what the notice just inside the entrance promised. It said: "remember, once a week,one of our customers gets free goods. This may be your lucky day!”
所有去新開張超市的主婦都有一個美好的愿望:成為一個購物不用交錢的幸運顧客。因為這是入口處的一則商店啟事所承諾的。上面寫著:“請記住,每周有一位顧客可以免費購物。今天也許就是您的幸運日!”
For several weeks Mrs. Edwards hoped, like many of her friends, to be the lucky customer. Unlike her friends, she never gave up hope. The cupboards in her kitchen were full of things, which she did not need. Her husband tried to advise her against buying things but failed. She dreamed of the day when the manager of the supermarket would approach her and say,"Madam, this is your lucky day. Everything in your basket is free.”
正像她的許多朋友一樣,有好幾個禮拜,愛德華太太都在盼望著自己會是那位幸運顧客。跟朋友不同的是,她從來不放棄這種期望。家里廚房的碗柜中都塞滿了她并不需要的東西。她的丈夫勸她不要亂買東西,但是她不聽。她夢想著有一天超市的經(jīng)理走到她的面前對她說:“夫人,今天是您的幸運日,您籃子里的每樣?xùn)|西都是免費的。”
On Friday morning, after she had finished her shopping and taken it to her car, she found that she had forgotten to buy any tea. She dashed back to the supermarket, got the tea and went towards the cash desk. As she did so, she saw the manager of the supermarket approach her. "Madam,”he said, holding out his hand, "I want to congratulate you! You are our lucky customer and everything you have in your basket is free”
一個周五的早晨,她在采購?fù)臧褨|西放進車里后,發(fā)現(xiàn)自己忘記了買茶葉。她快步回到超市,取了茶葉后走向收銀處。正在此時,他看到商店的經(jīng)理朝她走來,“夫人,”說著他伸出手來,“我要恭喜您!您是我們的幸運顧客,您籃子里的所有東西都是免費的。”
輕松幽默笑話:有時是我的
Hank lived in a small town, but then he got a job in a big city and moved there with his wife and his two children.
漢克住在一個小鎮(zhèn)上,但他在大城市中找了一份工作,于是她與妻子和兩個孩子搬到了城里。
On the first Saturday in their new home, Hank took his new red car out of garage and was washing it when a neighbor came by. When he saw Hank's new car, the neighbor stopped and looked at it for a minute. Then Hank turned and saw him.
在搬到新居的第一個周末,漢克把他紅色的新車從車庫里開出來沖洗,這時有位鄰居路過??吹綕h克的新車,這位鄰居駐足仔細看了一會兒。漢克轉(zhuǎn)身時看見了他。
The neighbor said, "That’s a nice car. Is it yours?”
鄰居說:“真是輛漂亮的轎車。是你的?”
“Sometimes ,” Hank answered.
“有時候是的。”漢克回答道。
The neighbor was surprised. “Sometimes?" hesaid, "Whatdoyoumean?"
鄰居感到很費解:“有時候是你的?這是什么意思?”
"Well ,”answered Hank slowly , "when there’s a patty in town, it belongs to my daughter, Jane. When there's a football game somewhere , it belongs to my son , Joe. When I've washed it,and it looks really nice and clean , it belongs to my wife. And when it needs gas, it’s mine.”
“是這樣的,”漢克慢慢地說道:“當鎮(zhèn)上有聚會的時候,它屬于我女兒簡;當哪個地方有足球賽的時候,它屬于我的兒子喬;當車子洗好以后,看起來又漂亮又干凈,這時候它屬于我妻子;當車子需要加油的時候,它就是我的了。”
輕松幽默笑話:健忘的丈夫
My husband’s uncle thought he had conquered the problem of trying to remember his wife a birthday and their anniversary. He opened an account with a florist, provides him with the relevant dates and gave instructions to send flowers along with an appropriate note signed, “your loving husband.”
我丈夫的叔叔想他已解決了試圖記住妻子的生日及他們結(jié)婚紀念日的難題。他在一家花店開了個戶頭,告訴店主相關(guān)的日期,并指示他送花時附上寫有“愛你的丈夫”的紙片。
His wife was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until one day, many bouquets later, when he came home, kissed his wife and said offhanded1y, "nice flowers honey. Where'd you get them?"
他妻子對這種關(guān)懷的新表現(xiàn)感到十分欣喜。他的這一辦法頗為有效,在送了許多束鮮花之后,有一天。他回到家,吻了吻妻子,然后漫不經(jīng)心地問道:“好漂亮的鮮花,親愛的。你從哪里’弄來的?”