經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話7篇

　　下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：太黑了，看不見

　　After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."

　　晚飯后，父親和母親都忙著和客人玩麻將，這時(shí)母親忽然想起點(diǎn)兒事來(lái)，便對(duì)正在看電視的兒子說道：“寶貝，去看看廚房里的燈是不是還開著呢?” 過了一會(huì)兒，兒子回來(lái)說：“媽，廚房里太黑了，我根本就看不見。”

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：One real man

　　The ruler of an ancient kingdom wanted to disprove the statement that the men of his domain were ruled by their wives. He had all the males in his kingdom brought before him and warned that any man who did not tell the truth would be punished severely(嚴(yán)格地，嚴(yán)厲地).

　　Then he asked all the men who obeyed their wives' directions and counsel(勸告，建議) to step to the left side of the hall. All the men did so but one little man who moved to the right.

　　It's good to see, said the king, that we have one real man in the kingdom. Tell these chickenhearted(膽小的) dunces(傻瓜) why you alone among them stand on the right side of the hall.

　　Your Majesty, came the reply in a squealing voice, it is because before I left home my wife told me to keep out of crowds.

　　一個(gè)真正的男子漢

　　古代有一個(gè)國(guó)王，他想證明他領(lǐng)土內(nèi)的男人并非像人們傳說的那樣，受到老婆的管制。他把王國(guó)里所有的男人都召到跟前，警告說，哪個(gè)男人膽敢不說實(shí)話，就會(huì)受到嚴(yán)厲的懲罰。

　　然后，他叫所有聽從妻子的命令和意見的男人都走向大廳的左側(cè)。所有的男人都站到了左側(cè)，只有一個(gè)小個(gè)子男人站到了右側(cè)。

　　國(guó)王說：看到我們國(guó)家里還有一個(gè)真正的男子漢，真是令人高興。告訴這些膽小的笨蛋，為什么在他們當(dāng)中只有你一個(gè)人站在大廳的右側(cè)。

　　陛下，那人尖聲地回答：因?yàn)樵谖页鲩T之前，我老婆告訴我不要扎堆。

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：萬(wàn)能的圣誕老人并非啥都知道

　　As a little girl climbed onto Santa's lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?"

　　The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: "Didn't you get my E-mail?"

　　一個(gè)女孩爬到圣誕老人的膝蓋上，圣誕老人例行公事的問：“今年圣誕節(jié)你想要什么呢?”

　　孩子瞪大眼睛驚訝的望著圣誕老人一分鐘都沒講話，然后喘著氣說到：“你沒收到我的電子郵件嗎?(我想要什么都寫上面了，萬(wàn)能的圣誕老人咋能不知道捏)”

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：借公牛一用

　　Once upon a time, there lived a rich man, but he didn't know any words.

　　One day, one of his friends wanted to borrow an ox from him, so he wrote a note and asked his servant to take it to this rich man.

　　After the servant gave the note to the rich man, he pretended to be reading it and after a while, he said, "OK, I know. Go and tell your master, I'll go myself shortly.

　　從前，有個(gè)人很富有，但他不識(shí)字。

　　一天，他的一位朋友想向他借一頭公牛，便寫了個(gè)條，讓仆人送到富人那里。 仆人把條子給了富人。富人便假裝看了一會(huì)兒，然后說道：“好啦，我知道了?；厝ジ嬖V你的主人，我馬上自己過去。”

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：What Color什么顏色

　　What Color什么顏色

　　An impoverished graduate student at Clemson University in South Carolina, I was excited when my father informed me that he had bought me a car. Hardly able to contain my enthusiasm, I asked Dad the typical questions: "What kind is it? Does it have a stick shift? Does it have a tape deck?"

　　"It's a 1982 Toyota," he replied. "It's a four speed, and, yes, it has a tape deck . " Pleased, I asked what color it was.

　　"Well, " he said uncomfortably, " which part?"

　　作為南卡羅萊那州克萊姆森大學(xué)的一個(gè)本科生，我囊中羞澀，當(dāng)我父親告訴我他為我買了輛車時(shí)，我甚是激動(dòng)。我?guī)缀蹩刂撇蛔∥业臒崆?，問了爸爸幾個(gè)關(guān)鍵問題：“什么車?有沒有手排擋?有沒有磁帶艙?”

　　“是1982年產(chǎn)豐田車，”他回答說，“四速，還有，是的，有磁帶艙。”我甚是高興，又問是什么顏色的。

　　“哦，”他很不舒服地說，“你指哪一部分?”

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：Akimbo (叉腰)

　　Just like most of other kids, aged two Emilia didn' t like washing hands──she' s always wiping the dirt off hands on her clothes. One day I accompanied her to have fried cicadae(蟬). Habitually she rubbed her grease fingers on her real silk short gown. I held back (阻擋) her from doing it: " What do you want to do?" She was immediately on to (意識(shí))her blame, replied at ease(從容): " I' m akimbo."

　　像大多數(shù)別的小孩一樣，兩歲艾咪麗雅不愛洗手，吃東西弄臟手，隨便在身上一抹就得了。一天我正陪她吃炸知了，她手上的油多了，便習(xí)慣地往真絲小褂子上蹭，我阻止道：“你想干什么?”她馬上意識(shí)到問題所在，從容答道：“我叉腰。

　　經(jīng)典趣味英語(yǔ)笑話：唯有我是司機(jī)

　　A short young man was running behind a bus which was full of passengers. But the bus still ran at a great speed.

　　"Stop, stop, " a passenger looked out of the window, and shouted at the young man, "you can't catch it ! "

　　"I must," the young fellow said, out of breath, "because I'm only driver of the bus.

　　在一輛滿載乘客的公共汽車后面，一位小個(gè)子青年在奔跑著。氣車仍在高速前進(jìn)。 “停下吧，”一位乘客把頭伸出窗子，對(duì)小個(gè)子喊道，“你追不上的!”

　　“我必須追上，”小個(gè)子氣喘吁吁地說，“我是司機(jī)!