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兒童趣味英語(yǔ)笑話三則

時(shí)間: 焯杰674 分享

  “哪里有人,哪里就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調(diào)劑品”。笑話使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松,在人們的日常生活中起著重要調(diào)劑作用。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)兒童趣味英語(yǔ)笑話三則,歡迎大家閱讀!

  兒童趣味英語(yǔ)笑話:養(yǎng)生之道

  An old man of seventy-six went to a doctor to request a general check up as to the state of his health.

  The doctor looked him up thoroughly, and then told him: "Everything is fine." As the old man paid his fee, the doctor asked him: "Have you followed any regimen to help you keepphysically fit?"

  "Well," replied the old man, "when I was married fifty years ago, I made an agreement with my wife that when I lost my temper and easily got angry, she would remain silent and when she lost her temper, I would leave the house. So for over fifty years I had enjoyed a fine outdoor life. That no doubt is the season why I can keep physically fit."

  一個(gè)76歲的老頭去找醫(yī)生給他做一次常規(guī)體檢,以了解他的健康狀況。

  醫(yī)生給他仔細(xì)檢查后告訴他:“一切都很好。”老人繳費(fèi)的時(shí)候,醫(yī)生問(wèn)他:“你有什么養(yǎng)生之道幫助你保持健康呢?”

  老頭回答道:“哦,50年前結(jié)婚時(shí)我就和妻子約定:當(dāng)我生氣了,容易發(fā)怒的時(shí)候,她要保持沉默;而當(dāng)她生氣時(shí),我就出門去。于是我得以享受了50多年美好的戶外生活。這一點(diǎn)就是能夠使我保持健康的原因。”

  兒童趣味英語(yǔ)笑話:自命不凡的學(xué)者

  A pretentious(自命不凡的) scholar was keen to show off. One day when he was being rowed across a stream, he asked the boatman: "Do you understand philosophy?"

  "No, sir, " said the boatman. "Then, " said the scholar, "one-fourth of your life is gone." After a while he asked again, "Do you know geology?" "Nothing at all," said the boatman.

  "Well, that makes one half of your life gone," said the scholar. Just then the boat suddenly tipped over. The boatman asked: "Can you swim?"

  The scholor said, gasping for breath: "No." "Then your whole life is gone," said the boatman.

  有個(gè)自命不凡的學(xué)者和喜歡賣弄。有一天他乘一只小船過(guò)河去時(shí),問(wèn)船夫:“你懂哲學(xué)嗎?” 船夫說(shuō):“不懂哇,先生。”

  學(xué)者就說(shuō):“那你的一生有四分之一算完了。”過(guò)了一會(huì)兒他又問(wèn):“你知道地質(zhì)學(xué)嗎?” 船夫說(shuō):“一點(diǎn)也不懂。”學(xué)者就說(shuō):“那你的一生的已有一半算完了。”

  就在這時(shí),小船忽然翻了,船夫問(wèn)學(xué)者:“你會(huì)游水嗎?”學(xué)者喘著氣說(shuō):“不會(huì)啊。”

  船夫說(shuō):“那你的一生就全完啦。”

  兒童趣味英語(yǔ)笑話:沒(méi)有必要

  A man stopped at a place where a subscription(捐獻(xiàn)) was being raised for the purpose of fencing the cemetery(墓地). A lot of people had made a donation.

  The man thought it was unnessary to do so. He said, "I have two reasons. In the first place, no one in the cemetery can get out; and in the second place, no one out want to get in."

  有一個(gè)人在一個(gè)地方停了下來(lái),看到那里正在為墓地建造一道柵欄募集捐款。很多人捐了錢。

  這個(gè)人認(rèn)為沒(méi)有必要這樣做。他說(shuō):“我有兩個(gè)理由,首先,墓地里的人沒(méi)有一個(gè)人能夠出來(lái);其次,外面的人也沒(méi)有一個(gè)會(huì)想進(jìn)去。”

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