簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)五則
簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)五則
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話(huà)是人們生活中不可缺少的“調(diào)劑品”。笑話(huà)使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松,在人們的日常生活中起著重要調(diào)劑作用。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)五則,歡迎大家閱讀!
簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)1:
How do I get the gum out? Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their ears from popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, I'm meeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum out from my ears?
怎么把口香糖取出來(lái)呢當(dāng)空中小姐給乘客們發(fā)口香糖的時(shí)候,她解釋說(shuō)口香糖有助于他們防止耳鳴。飛機(jī)著陸后,一位乘客跑到這位空中小姐面前,說(shuō)道:“ 我馬上就要見(jiàn)到我妻子了。我怎么才能把口香糖從耳朵里面取出來(lái)呢?”
簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)2:
A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?" The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend."
一個(gè)小偷在一家珠寶店企圖偷走一只手表的時(shí)候被當(dāng)場(chǎng)擒獲。“聽(tīng)著,”小偷說(shuō),“我知道你們也不想惹麻煩。我把這只表買(mǎi)下,然后我們就當(dāng)什么也沒(méi)發(fā)生,你看怎樣?”經(jīng)理表示同意,然后列了一張售貨單。小偷看著單子說(shuō)道:“這比我最初的預(yù)算稍稍高了一點(diǎn),你們還有沒(méi)有便宜一點(diǎn)兒東西。”
簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)3:
he warden of the prison felt sorry for one of his inmates because every weekend on Visitor’s Day, most of the prisoners had family members and friends coming, but poor George always sat alone in his cell. So one Visitor’s Day, the warden called George to his office and said, "I notice you’ve never had any visitors, George." Sympathetic, he put his hand on George’s shoulder. "Tell me, don’t you have any friends or family?" George replied, "Oh, sure I do, Warden. It’s just that they’re all in here!"
典獄長(zhǎng)對(duì)獄中一位囚犯深感同情,因?yàn)槊糠曛苣┑奶皆L日,大多數(shù)囚犯都有家人或朋友來(lái)訪,但是可憐的喬治總是孤伶伶地坐在自己的囚室中。因此在一個(gè)探訪日,典獄長(zhǎng)把喬治叫到辦公室說(shuō):“喬治,我注意到從來(lái)沒(méi)有人來(lái)探望過(guò)你。”他滿(mǎn)懷同情地把手放在喬治的肩膀上:“告訴我,你沒(méi)有任何朋友或家人嗎?”喬治回答:“喔!當(dāng)然有,典獄長(zhǎng),只不過(guò)他們?nèi)荚谶@里面!”
簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)4:
Dan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he left his friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight." Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box." Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."
丹在教他的兒子怎樣拳擊。他告訴他的朋友:“這是一個(gè)粗暴的世界,所以我要教我的兒子怎么去拼搏。”朋友:“如果他碰上的對(duì)手是一個(gè)比他高大,健壯而且也會(huì)拳擊的人怎么辦?”丹:“我也會(huì)教他怎么樣賽跑呢。”
簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話(huà)5:
One day, the father lets eight year-old son send a letter, the son took the letter , the father then remembered didn't write the address and addressee's name on the envelope.
After the son comes back, the father asks him: "You have thrown the letter in the mail box?"
"Certainly"
"You have not seen on the envelope not to write the address and the addressee name?"
"I certainly saw nothing written on the envelope."
"Then why you didn't take it back?"
"I also thought that you do not write the address and the addressee, is for does not want to let me know that you do send the letter to who!"
有一天,父親讓八歲的兒子去寄一封信,兒子已經(jīng)拿著信跑了,父親才想起信封上沒(méi)寫(xiě)地址和收信人的名字。
兒子回來(lái)后,父親問(wèn)他:“你把信丟進(jìn)郵筒了嗎?” “當(dāng)然”“你沒(méi)看見(jiàn)信封上沒(méi)有寫(xiě)地址和收信人名字嗎?”
“我當(dāng)然看見(jiàn)信封上什么也沒(méi)寫(xiě)”“那你為什么不拿回來(lái)呢?”
“我還以為你不寫(xiě)地址和收信人,是為了不想讓我知道你把信寄給誰(shuí)呢!”
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